I heard a quote the other day that said something along the lines of “you need to know when to put yourself first, you need to know when to be selfish.” This is so very powerful to me. It’s not always easy to give ourselves a break and be selfish. Yet, it is necessary.
The best thing you can do for yourself is to put yourself first from time to time. For me, it's easy to put my friend’s problems ahead of mine and I know many others who do this. This can be very harmful to you though. You can’t procrastinate all your problems. That will only make them worse. The best way to be mentally healthy is to deal with them head-on.
That being said, it is okay to need a break. It is okay to calm down and collect yourself before you face whatever it is. The important thing is that at the end of the day you still get up and dust yourself off and keep going. Whatever it is that you have to do to make that happen, do it. Don’t feel bad about putting yourself first. That’s what you need sometimes.
In this time, it is also completely okay to lean on people. Which people, you may ask? The people whose problems you normally put above your own…where are they? They should be there for you when you have your weak moments as you are for them. If they aren’t and they don’t have something else major going on in their life then it's okay to let them know that’s not okay, because it isn’t.
If you are like me, you are quick to make excuses for people when they aren’t there for you. Sometimes though, you need to know when to say enough is enough. If they aren’t putting as much effort into the relationship as you are, then call them out on it. If after that they don’t make more of an effort, it’s okay to take a step back from them.
If you were a priority in their life they would make time for you in some form or another. So be selfish and forward and do things exactly the way you need/want to do them. At the end of the day it is your life and pleasing other people can only get you so far.
