Much like any other girl, I had an awesome group of friends in high school. We were really close from the first day of freshman year to the very last of our senior year, and by the time graduation rolled through, a lot of talk was going around about what we all wanted to do in college. We talked about majors, and college sports, but most of the talk was about going through sorority recruitment. I had friends that were going to the University of Georgia, Auburn, Alabama, William and Mary, Valdosta State, and I was headed to Middle Tennessee.
Pretty much every single one of my friends was going to go through recruitment. There were only about two or three of us that decided not to go down that path. I was pretty set from the beginning that I wasn’t even going to mess with it. I had a ton of people tell me that I should rush because I was going so far away from my home in Georgia. They told me I would make more friends that way and that it would provide opportunities for me later on in life. I could see where that may have been the case, but I also had my mother behind me (who was never in a sorority in college) telling me that if I wanted to rush, that was fine, but I would have to pay my dues myself. I totally understood that though. Most of my friends, with the exception of some, had parents who would pay for their sorority stuff. I wasn’t going to have that luxury, so I took that into consideration when deciding if I should rush or not.
When August came around and all of us drifted off to new places, my friends were posting all of their pictures from Bid Day. They were dressed in bright colors, hugging onto their new sisters, and throwing up their sorority’s hand gestures while little me was sitting in my new apartment all alone simply scrolling through all of these in awe. I’m not going to lie, I was a little jealous that I couldn’t be doing the same thing right then and there, but looking back on it now, I’m not sure why I was feeling so sorry for myself.
My roommate took a bid during her recruitment week, so for a whole year, I have gotten a firsthand look at what all being in a sorority entails. I am not by any means putting down the girls who choose to be a part of these groups. I am simply saying that being in a sorority is not for everyone. It requires a special kind of girl to take on the responsibility of helping out with the Homecoming float at 2am when you have an 8am test the next morning, or wearing your letters to class with a skirt one day because it is required, or even just participating in the Greek Life soccer tournament held every year. Now that I have witnessed how much goes into sorority life, I no longer feel bad for not doing it because I am simply not that kind of girl.
Luckily at MTSU, Greek Life is not the only thing important to students, and the ones who are in sororities and fraternities are not completely wrapped up in it, or at least not the people I’ve met. My roommate from this past year is a perfect example. Even though she was in a sorority, she never treated me any differently or made me feel as if I was less than her. She would invite to her cookouts, introduce me to her sorority sisters and let me help her pick out outfits for her socials. Some people at other universities aren’t as lucky as I am to have those kinds of friends. This past year, I visited a friend of mine who attends a D-1 university. Don’t get me wrong. The trip was awesome, and I had a blast seeing her after 4 months of being apart, but there were some points in trip that I felt a little beneath people because I not only didn’t attend that school, but I wasn’t even a sorority at my own. For example, we were out downtown and my friend was introducing me to some fraternity guys. I told them my name and that I went to school in the Nashville, TN area. Automatically they asked me, “What sorority are you in?” Now, I’m not sure if it’s just the world we live in today or what, but I have never been more offended by a question in my life. And to make matters worse, after I told them I wasn’t in one, they just said, “Oh,” turned around, and walked off completely. I didn’t let it get to me though. I would probably never see those guys again, and the point of my trip wasn’t to become friends with some jerks who wouldn’t even give me the time of day. I was there to spend time with my friend and be supportive of her decisions to attend this university. Besides that one little encounter, the trip was a blast and I can’t wait to go back and visit again.
My point is that it’s okay to not be in a sorority. It’s okay to not get a million cute t-shirts, and it’s okay to not have 100 people in your contact list that you can call if you need something. In my first year of being an outsider of the sorority life, I’ve learned to be extremely independent. If I had gotten into a sorority, I probably wouldn’t have been able to travel as much to see my boyfriend, or drive home as often as I did, and my schoolwork probably would’ve plummeted. I’m not saying that being in a sorority and doing all these things is impossible, but I’m just not the type of person that can take all those challenges at once. So this is for all the girls who have ever felt left out because they never got into a sorority or the ones that never had it in the financial cards for them. It is going to be okay, I promise. You will graduate college, find a nice husband, have seven dogs, and you will never once feel bad for yourself again just because you weren’t in a sorority.
