At a certain point in life, it feels like the unending question that almost everyone wants to know is "so what are you doing with your life?". It feels like once you get to your later teen years, people expect you to start having it all figured out. Ask any twenty year old how many times they've been asked this exact question, and they will tell you it's been more times than they can count. But asking the question isn't really the problem. It's expecting every twenty year old out there to have an answer that's the issue.
The honest response of "I don't really know" seems to be about the worst answer anyone could possibly give. You're barely an adult, but you're supposed to know exactly what you want to do, where you want to do it, and when. And if you do know all of that, then that's great! But I just want to say that it's also okay if you don't.
It's okay if you don't know what you want to do for the rest of your life. It's okay if you aren't sure what you want to major in. And it's okay if you don't know what you want to do with that major. It's okay if you don't know where you want to go after graduation. And it's even okay if you're not sure if you'll graduate at all. It's okay if you want to move back home and be with your family. And it's also okay if you don't. If you want to move around and explore life, that's okay. And if you want to stick to your roots and follow your heart back to what you've always known, that's okay, too.
It's okay if you don't know if you want to be in a relationship at this always changing time in your life. But it's also okay if your relationship is what's most important to you. It's okay to tell the person you're dating that you need more than what they're giving. And it's also okay to change your dreams and plans if the person you love has become that dream. It's okay to stay somewhere because of one person. But it's also okay to leave for that one person, too.
Going into this exciting, but scary phase of your life with concrete expectations will only limit you. The only guarantee in life is that there are no guarantees. People are always changing, so naturally the dreams and goals we have are always changing, too. The things we may have always wanted when we were kids just might not be the same when we're adults. It's okay to change your mind and go off course a little bit. There's a reason why our greatest desires are usually parallel to our greatest fears. If they came to us that easy, then they wouldn't be worth it. There's an old proverb that describes this phase in any young adults life perfectly.
"People plan, and God laughs"
We seek control in every aspect of our lives. We want to make decisions, have plans, and follow through on them. But that's not life. That's just not how it works. Nothing feels better than having a plan and knowing what you want to do. It's absolutely okay to have hopes and dreams and make plans in order to reach them. But when life comes knocking at the door, the greatest way to answer is with an open mind, and more importantly, an open heart. So it's okay if you don't have it all figured out. It's okay if you don't know where you'll be five years from now, or even a month from now.
Because after all, people plan, and God laughs. And all we can do is try to laugh with him.
