You may have seen memes that allude to “cuffing season," which is the period of time (i.e. the fall and winter months) where many people begin new relationships. It makes sense why so many individuals jump into relationships during this time of year. There’s Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, and of course, Valentine’s Day-- all of which seem so much more exciting with a significant other by your side. The temperature drops and the snow begins falling, and who doesn’t want someone to cuddle and drink hot chocolate with on a cold winter day? And of course, there’s the fact that people are starting college, and the idea of an unconditional support system sounds lovely.
All of these things sound wonderful... Unless you’re one of the people who isn’t getting “cuffed” this season.
Maybe you’ve gone on a few dates and they haven’t ended well. Maybe you liked someone and they chose to fall for someone else. Maybe you just haven’t found anyone who piqued your interest. There are so many reasons to explain why you’re not currently in a relationship and they’re all valid, but maybe that validity isn’t enough.
Most of us yearn to have a deep, meaningful, romantic relationship. We want someone to love and adore us for all of our quirks, faults, and idiosyncrasies. We want to go on cute dates and get showered with affection. We want to be loved.
It can be incredibly difficult to be single while simultaneously wanting a relationship like the one described above. It’s even more difficult when it seems that everyone around you is in a happy, committed relationship, and you’re not. You start to wonder if there’s something terribly wrong with you. You begin to question your own self-worth. You can’t even go on social media without feeling envious of all the adorable couple pictures that inevitably show up.
I speak from experience: your relationship status does not define your self-worth. You’ve probably heard that a million times, but it’s true. Someone’s inability to see your worth does not negate your own.
Every one of you who’s reading this has something they’re extremely talented in – maybe it’s writing, or playing a sport, or listening to others, and that’s incredibly awesome. Work those talents! You’re young and you have so much potential to go out and do amazing things, with or without a significant other.
Most importantly, you are loved.
There are people in your life who deeply love and care about you. They encourage and support you; they make you laugh when you want to cry and they are always there for you. Whenever you’re feeling extra lonely because of the fact that you’re single, just remember that there are so many people in your life who love you so much, and that will never change.
Lastly, I leave you with this – many people don’t meet their future spouses until later in life, but when they do, it’s a life-altering moment. It doesn’t matter how long they've waited because they have finally found the person they're madly in love with and want to spend the rest of their lives with. Never give up on the idea of your person if that’s what you want because they’re out there and are coming as fast as they can.
Until they come (and I know that sometimes it feels they’re so far away), just keep being the best you you can be and everything else will fall into place.