Endings are never my favorite part of the story. It is hard to think about something that you have come to know and love so well will no longer be a part of your life. Breakups are endings to a certain part of your story. They are sometime abrupt or long and drawn out. Whether your relationship was long or short, when you truly love someone and then have to let them go, a piece of your soul goes with them.
My relationship of 5 years just came to an end, and I am still processing. It is sometimes unbearable to face the reality that I can't talk to my best friend anymore. I can't stand to encounter someone I love/ed so much only see a stranger looking back at me. And to realize that the future I had planned was only a daydream banished with the rest of my memories that are too hard to confront is crushing. No one wants to talk about it, because it is uncomfortable. It is uncomfortable to see friends that you know were his friends more than yours. It is uncomfortable having to take down pictures that you cherished so much because you can't look at them without thinking about all of the good memories that are permanently a part of your past. There is no more future with your person because they aren't yours anymore.
In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have dealt with this crushing blow to my heart near as well if I hadn't found Friends. Specifically, Monica and Richard. They loved each other tremendously, but because they didn't have the same life plans, they knew they had to go their separate ways. Even though you have made the right decision for both parties, it does not lessen the pain.
It seems everything still rings with memories and laughter that we shared. It is so hard to feel joy when it can't be shared. I would be lying if I didn't say I missed him, but I think something would be terribly wrong with me if I didn't. He was a massive part of my life for 5 years, and now I am having to fill the void left in me. I don't share this sad story out of a need for sympathy or condolences, but as a message of hope.
We all deserve to have our love matched and cherished. Each and everyone of us. There is someone out there that is waiting on you whether they know it or not. These heartbreaks prove that you cared. There are no hard feelings or ill will just a period tinged with sadness. It is okay to grieve, but don't wallow. Go out and learn who you are as an individual. Learn to love yourself, learn a new skill, develop new hobbies, make and preserve friendships. It is an odd feeling not being connected to another person, but just know that no matter what you are going to be okay. Just get back on the horse and start living again. You owe that to yourself.
