Let's be honest, how many times has someone asked you how you were doing or how classes were going and your response was, "it's fine" when it really wasn't? If you are like me, it happens multiple times a day. In fact, it has kind of become a joke between my friends and me. As everything in our lives seem to be falling apart we smile, laugh, and say, "it's fine". It might be funny in the moment, but in reality, everything seems to be working against you and it really is not humorous.
I am sure you have all heard people say or have seen posts on the internet claiming that "i'm fine" is the most told lie. If we know this, 1) why do we let ourselves move on without hesitation when someone tells us they are fine if we know that they most likely really are not, and 2) why do we keep telling others that we are fine when we really are not?
Friends, it is okay to admit that you are not fine.
We are in college. We barely know how to adult. We do not have to have everything in life figured out, I promise.
We mess up. We fail. We find ourselves in difficult situations. There are going to be so many days where life seems to be falling apart, and those are the days we should be reaching out to our friends and families for love and support. We should not have to feel as though we need to hide the fact that things are not fine. We were made both for community and love. You will only find those things when you reach out, not when you respond, "It's fine", and you will only give those things when you reach out to those who respond, "It's fine" to you.
Be the person others know they can count on, but do not let that keep you from counting on others as well. Just because you hold other people together does not mean you do not need someone to hold you together sometimes. You are worthy of the same care and affection you give to others.
Telling others how you really are is challenging. I do not suggest you display all of the inner feelings of your heart on social media, but opening your heart to your close friends will do wonders. You might not find yourself as alone in your interior battles as you may have thought. Take the risk and open up. You are not helping yourself or anyone else when your go to response is, "It's fine".
The next time someone asks how you are doing, although it might be much easier to tell them the lie, tell them the truth. The next time you ask someone how they are doing seek an authentic response. You never know if your thoughtfulness and genuine interest in how someone is doing will provoke the conversation that gives them the hope and strength to get through the day.