It won't happen to me. It can't happen to me. I'm careful, I take care of myself, my friends are always with me, I'll be fine.
That's what most of us tell ourselves, but the harsh reality is that one in five college-aged women will be sexually assaulted. And that's really just a guess because a large majority of sexual assaults are not reported, are not addressed at all. Sexual assaults happen more frequently on college campuses than anywhere else, and yes campuses try to initiate campaigns and prevention, but when those prevention methods fail, the administration fails us. No matter how many programs there are to teach people not to rape, not to take advantage of girls and that silence is not consent, it still happens, and it can happen to any of us.
Sexual assault awareness is growing, but it's still a taboo topic to many people. I, for one, refuse to be afraid or held back anymore from talking about sexual assault. I refuse to accept the fact that the people who commit these heinous crimes get away with a slap on the wrist, a hateful text message, or absolutely no repercussions at all. I refuse to accept the fact that those assaulted are asked how much they had to drink or what they were wearing. I refuse to accept the fact that people are struggling with mental illnesses that were brought on by a sexual assault that should have never happened. I refuse to accept the fact that victims are looked at as sluts or naive because of a situation they had no control over.
I say this because it happens. Sexual assault happens, and it's time to talk about it. Regardless of the prevention methods, the campaigns, raising awareness, it happens. It happens to us girls who are always careful and to those who are reckless. It happens to us girls who never drink too much or lose control, and it happens to the girls who sometimes have a shot too many. It happens to us girls who think we're with people we can trust, and it happens to girls who hang out with strangers. It happens to girls who party every night and those who rarely go out.
It can happen to anyone, it even happened to me.
No matter how many precautions you take, how trustworthy the people you surround yourself with seem to be, how little you drink, how many layers of clothes you wear, it can still happen to you. No matter if you're the mom of your friend group, the goody-goody, or the responsible one, it can still happen to you. Even if you're the reckless one, the one who is invincible, the one who has made it this far so it won't happen now - you're wrong. It can happen to any of us.
I hope it doesn't, in a perfect world people would know that "no" means no, and silence also means no, the only thing that doesn't mean no is yes. People would know that the girl stumbling around the party doesn't want to go home with them, or that giving a girl strong drinks or drugs is just wrong. But sadly, we don't live in a perfect world. I wish that we could go out and not have a worry in the world because prevention works and people listen, but that's just not the case. In this world no matter how many times you say no, how many tears you shed, or how much you fight, you still have a one in five chance to be sexually assaulted, and it will change your life.
