It rained yesterday,

A kind of rain that makes you regret getting out of bed in the morning.

The kind of rain that isn’t the end of a drought, or that is life giving.

The kind that freezes on the tops of bridges, that leaves the cold deeper than the clothes.

It rained yesterday, and the world saw what I see every day.

This isn’t about the fact that the water cycle happened over a small little part of an Ohio.

This is about how everyday hearing the alarm and not throwing my phone across the room.

How the task of swinging my legs off the side of my bed is a fate worse than death.

It rained yesterday,

And all I considered walking out in anything other than clothes just so I could feel something again.

The drops of water felt like razors cutting across my face

My shoes flooded like weights pulling me deeper into the abyss

The rain drowns out the sounds of everything so I can finally not think

The street lamps projecting there lights across the sidewalk, seeing the faces of my insecurities

It rained yesterday and I thought about playing chicken with a bus.

It rained yesterday, and I wish I was one of the puddles that got to escape down the drain

Or that can just sink until they are no more.

It rained yesterday, and the sun came up.

That's the thing, the sun always comes up again.

It always does, in all of human history the sun always rises.

But when all you see is rain, what does a sunny day feel like?