A couple weeks back, I took a ride on the MAX into downtown Portland. I was standing on the stairs when I rode so I got to look over the aisles at everyone. Half the people riding had earbuds in and the other half were doing some other activity in order to avoid eye contact and act distracted. I couldn’t help but let my eyes fall on a girl with flaming purple hair and a wicked smile. My eyes caught her scars. They lined up and down her arms, and while some were obviously old, there were others that were fresh and crimson with dried blood. She was doing the same as everyone else in the bus, avoiding eye contact and waiting for her moment of escape, when she no longer had to be around people she didn’t know. I couldn’t help but feel alone in the crowded MAX; and I watched everyone else who was alone in there as well. I didn’t need to see the physical scars to know there was more than one person in that bus who had felt pain, self-harmed, or even thought about killing themselves.
According to Duke University Researchers, “Between 1985 and 2004, the number of people who said there was no one with whom they discussed important matters tripled, to 25 percent…” We constantly walk by, ride with, and get stuck in elevators with people every day. We have neighbors we never converse with and over 500 friends on Facebook who don’t even know our middle name. “The number of people who indicated that they had a neighbor with whom they could confide has dropped more than half since 1985…” Depression, anxiety, and suicide have all skyrocketed in the last 50 years. People are constantly feeling alone, even when we stand side by side. Yet, it’s so much easier to plug in and tune out.
Even just wanting to start a conversation in the MAX seemed impossible to me. The air was so stiff and people all seemed to just want to get away from one another. The irony is we have an overpopulated planet of eight billion people, and yet most of us have felt isolated or alone at some point in our lives. Community is so much more valuable than people can even fathom. The faith that goes into trusting others around us is, of course, difficult, but it is also invaluable. Rebuilding communities and trust within the people around us can also improve our personal lives. I hope this acknowledgment of isolation will give people the courage to reach out and connect more.
