Have you ever woken up from a nap and stared at the wall wondering why you allowed yourself to sleep so long because now it’s 10 p.m, the whole days gone, and you haven’t accomplished much of anything? Well, that's how I feel, except almost every day.
I recently read a tweet that said, “I’m in college, but I still feel like I’m not doing enough.” Not to be dramatic, but this tweet hit me like a freight train and I’m almost positive I’ve never read anything more relatable.
Why is it that I constantly feel like I should be doing more?
More planning. More goals. More internships. Making more money. Joining more clubs. Having more answers. Traveling more places. More. More. More.
As if being a full-time college student in itself isn’t already a lot. Despite the tests, the reading quizzes, the papers, the presentations, the 11:59 deadlines, the endless late nights working and early morning classes, I still feel like what I’m doing isn’t enough.
Now if you would have asked me what I planned to do with my life four years ago I would have given you a half shoulder shrug and probably wouldn’t have given your question a second thought. I knew I had time. I wasn’t worried about what I should be doing, could be doing or what the next person was doing. I was enjoying exactly where I was.
And somehow in the mix of preparing for my Spanish oral and learning how to properly cite in APA, I forgot this. I forgot the importance of my right “now” and learning how to savor and appreciate THIS moment.
Yet, it’s so easy to watch youtube videos and scroll down your Instagram timeline and see twenty-year-olds today buying cars and houses, traveling out of the country every other week, and starting families. As I stare at my $10.47 account balance I feel that it’s only natural to assume that I’m wasting my 24 hour days.
But what I fail to realize is that I’m walking my own journey. Of course I want to be successful, but my success isn’t yours and yours isn’t your neighbors and theirs isn’t that Instagram models.
What I fail to realize is that I’m still young and it’s okay to not have it all figured out yet.
I fail to realize that at this moment in my life I’m doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing.
So, if you ever wonder if what you’re doing is enough, remember it really is.