One day in my Sociology class freshman year (where I now realize I knew virtually nothing), my professor asked us to raise our hands if we considered ourselves a feminist. In a class of about 25 people, only a meager five raised their hands. She then defined feminism and still, only an additional 10 raised their hands. The significance and power of the word feminism, combined with my lack of conviction in my opinions, led me to somewhat half-heartedly raise my hand. I now realize I was very foolish.
But that is a problem in itself. Why is there such a gaping disparity between those who are actually a self-proclaimed feminist and those who may be a feminist but refuse to raise their hands? And why are so many people afraid to be seen as a feminist in a college classroom, arguably one of the most accepting areas (especially at a small liberal arts school)? Some argue feminism takes away from masculinity, but this really just seems like an excuse to me. So the question then turns to how can we, as a society, destigmatize feminism?
The first thing I would change would be the language and how we talk about feminism.
Nowadays, it is easy to pick up a book or search for feminist articles. However, because we have categorized feminism into an entirely new genre, we have perpetuated this idea of “other” and complicated a simple idea. A few months ago I stumbled upon this article (which I cannot find for the life of me please don’t sue me) with a solution that honestly seemed blatantly obvious to me:
Rather than viewing feminism as a radical idea and those who support equal rights as feminists, we should normalize and view those who do not support equal rights as SEXIST.
This does not seem like a difficult concept to me. Some people claim they support women’s rights but only when it is convenient or easy for them. Some disagree with the notion that women are just as capable as men in the workplace, sports or social life. This is not feminism.
We cannot just choose when to turn off our blinders and ignore blatant sexism. I want to be clear: If you discourage women from working in STEM (science, technology, engineering or mathematics) careers or politics, where they are grossly underrepresented, then that is sexist. If you shame women for prioritizing their work life over family life (i.e. for delaying marriage for work, not having kids), for not marrying, or for even wanting sex, then that is sexist. Feminism is not about shaming other women for their choices. Whether women choose to be a stay-at-home mom or never having kids, this does not make them any less feminine. It is their choice and it is sexist to condemn them for a lifestyle that you may not prefer to live.
Let’s instead call these sexist women and men hypocritical and work towards making feminism the social norm.
Apologies in advance for making this political, but how about the next time someone comments on how intelligent Hillary Clinton is for a woman, or remarks on how far she has come for a woman,we stop them. Because although it is amazing on how far Hillary Clinton has come, what we must do is accept and work towards normalizing this.
Yes, she is the first woman to clinch a major party's nominee. (Woot-woot!) But what we must do is celebrate and normalize her success in order to get past this gender barrier. I challenge you to stand up against the sexism, sexist comments or beliefs that will surely unravel as the general election nears. Because you can bet yourself "The Donald" and GOP will target her gender, personality and status as a mother, grandmother and wife over her vast experience or platform. Because it's so much easier to attack her fierce personality and pantsuits over her moderate policies that actually make sense (at least to me). But that’s an entirely different story.
Feminism is not about shaming men or even other women. It is about togetherness and equality. It is about redefining the social norm and changing our language on how we view individuals and calling out those who attempt to make women small and take away their self-worth. Once we make sexism the scapegoat, I am sure we will make more strides. Please do not forget the world is already doing a good job. Despite what the media or anti-feminists will tell you, we have come a long way and change does not happen overnight. I just hope that by the time my theoretical children are in college, asking people if they are feminists will not even be a question because the world will hopefully know the answer. I am not even alluding to the point that everyone will be a feminist by then. Like I said, I cannot force you to do anything. But I just hope that the ones who do identify as a feminist raise their hand tall and proud.
And I hope you listen to Beyoncè's sort of new album "Lemonade." Because I 'aint sorry. Hella nah.