In my twenty plus years of life, I've been fortunate enough to stumble upon love two separate times. I say "fortunate" not because I look back on the failed love with admiration, wonderful memories or a feeling of thankfulness-- but instead, because without it I might not appreciate the man in my life as much as I do. The differences between these two loves are like night and day, one was a boy and one is a man.
The differences between what make someone a boy or a man has nothing to do with how many birthdays they've experienced, their educational classification, or the number of relationships they've been involved in. It has to do with who they are, how they act and the way they treat you.
A boy tears you down, while a man lifts you up.
We all know that fantastic girl who fails to notice that the boy treating her terribly isn't worth it, and that's because through him she's forgotten her own worth. A man will shower you with compliments, even when you're sitting in pajamas with a messy bun. He wants you to know how valuable you are, inside and out.
A boy looks at the women around you, while a man only notices you.
Whenever I see a boyfriend checking out other women right in front of his girlfriend I can't help but roll my eyes in discuss. A man literally doesn't care about the other women around him, because he's already completely fulfilled when it comes to your relationship.
A boy won't grow up for you, while a man already did in preparation for you.
Boys love to use excuses like their age, being in college, or that "the timing isn't right" when it comes to not wanting to grow up. A man doesn't have or need, those excuses. He doesn't need you to ask him to be mature, he already is.
A boy shows you appreciation via social media posts, while a man appreciates you in real life.
I can't tell you how many times I've seen a boy post a #WCW Instagram picture to make up for ditching a date, cheating on his girlfriend or some other action that made her upset. A man won't need to post on social media in an attempt to "show" that he cares about you, he shows you every day in real life.
A boy is living for the moment, while a man is living for moments to come.
Life is all about "having a good time" for boys. Whether it's blacking out, doing drugs or having unprotected sex, a boy will justify it with the idea that life is all about having "fun." A man isn't irresponsible in the name of "fun" because he understands that a solid relationship and future is giving him that experience for a lifetime, not just one night.
A boy is insecure in himself, while a man embraces who he is with confidence.
Do you ever notice that boys all have the same opinions or agree with those around them? That's because they are afraid to stand up for who they are for the fear of being judged or not accepted. A man knows who he is and never hides or compromises it. He's never one person with you and another person with his friends-- it's just his authentic self all day, every day.
A boy is drawn in by physical attraction, while a man is captivated by your soul.
Looks aren't everything, but it seems like boys don't really care. Maybe it's because they aren't thinking long term or maybe it's because they don't care to dig deeper. When a man comes into your life, your looks will be appreciated but your soul is what he'll fall in love with.
A boy loves the good in you, while a man loves all of you.
It's hard for a boy to find something wrong with you when you're making him dinner, looking your best and going out of your way for him-- who wouldn't love that? But what about on your not so good days? What about when you're stressed, busy, in a bad mood? A man understands there are good and bad days-- he loves you through them all.
A man is worth your investment and a boy isn't. Investing in a boy will leave you empty, feeling like you're not enough and wondering if this is all "love" has to offer. Hold out for the man, because you deserve everything he will give you.