I have noticed that, in society today, introverts can get a bad reputation. Or maybe not necessarily a bad reputation, but certainly a misguided one. Even introverts give other introverts a hard time. Introverts are seen as awkward and painfully shy, pretentious, overwhelmingly depressing, grumpy, and altogether unapproachable. Ultimately, society portrays introverts as incredibly antisocial beings. As an introvert, I am actually rather offended by this. Who wants to be seen as the antisocial weirdo just based on a personality type they have no control over?

The stigma surrounding introversion is the result of a societal misconception. Society sees the tendencies of an introvert (being alone, being slow to speak, being self-oriented, etc) and incorrectly labels the introvert as antisocial and shy. I’ve even heard someone say that if you’re an introvert, that means you hate other people. I am here to tell you that is not the case.

Let me illustrate what an introvert really is. I just recently got back from a weeklong vacation with my two best friends. I loved every minute of that vacation, and I didn’t want it to end. However, that entire week I hardly got any alone time: we were around and on top of each other all week long. I loved being with my best friends and doing things and talking with them! But I was exhausted by the end of the week. It took me a couple of days to recover physically because of the time change but mentally because of the excessive time I had spent with other people.

As an introvert, even though I loved spending time with my friends, I needed time alone. Why? Because being alone is where introverts find their energy. They love being in their own minds and being able to think clearly, and they need time to recharge after large, prolonged social gatherings. I loved vacationing with my besties, but I needed a lot of time alone afterwards.

If that still doesn’t make sense, let me try it this way: extroverts like to relax with others while introverts like to relax alone. After a particularly long and busy week, introverts would prefer to spend a night quietly alone in order to unwind while the extroverts in their life are making plans to go out in order to let loose.

Contrary to popular belief, most introverts generally like other humans and they like to do things. They like to be included in plans, even—and sometimes especially—social plans. They just need time to recharge afterwards.

After a week of nonstop social interaction, I needed time by myself in my thoughts, and I didn’t want to be bothered by other social plans. That’s just how I am wired to relax. It’s not that I’m antisocial; I actually really enjoy social events and being with others. I just need time to myself as well.

If I can speak on behalf of introverts, as I am probably horribly unqualified to do, I think we’d like to tell others that we aren’t all shy. We aren’t all antisocial. And we certainly aren’t all people-haters. “Introvert” simply means you use your energy while around others while “extrovert” simply means you get your energy from being around others. Oh, and one personality type is in no way superior to the other.