As a nation, our political and social climates have become increasingly tense. Our everyday lives have become entrenched in debate and conversation about social justice as well as reform. Our country is becoming more and more divided, and our opinions sees to rage louder than any other part of us. All this has become louder than our compassion, selflessness, and respect for fellow human beings. In this struggle, I think we have lost sight of the integral part of everyone's opinions: their story. Behind every opinion and way of living there is a story that runs through the very heart of that individual. This rings true in all subjects but particularly ones concerning social justice. In this arena, we have either addressed, or ignored, conversations on Islamophobia, homophobia, sexism, and possibly most of all, racism.

The discussion of institutionalized racism against the black community has been calling to be heard for decades now. There are some that argue that the black communities are being treated almost no better before the civil rights movement, while other would say these groups are not discriminated against at all anymore. In the end, what never ceases to happen is the loss of empathy for the struggle of a fellow human being. In such a politically charged moment in our history, everything has become a battle to win rather than an opportunity to better understand and serve each other. What we have lost here is the spirit of true discourse with the intent of understanding and empathizing with one another on a human level. We are so wrapped up in our appearances and so hardwired for defensiveness that we can no longer hear the story each of us is trying to tell and the hopes we wish to protect. Ultimately, we have stopped reaching for understanding and in that become completely disconnected from each other.

I am a firm believer in the power of conversation and empathy. I have had people tell me that it is the easy or weak way out, but I remain firm in this belief. So, in the spirit of understanding and gaining knowledge from the stories which I do not carry, I make it a point to talk to people that experience things I do not. With all this said, I decided to interview a friend of mine to talk about race relations in America today. The objective here was to hear what he, a young black man, had to say about his feelings and thoughts towards how we as a nation have handled racial division and how we engage (or not) in that discourse.

*I would like to note also, that this one man's opinions do not speak for an entire community of millions of people. This interview was done simply to hear the perspective of someone who is affected by racism in their everyday life-- a struggle that I cannot speak on, nor can I fully understand. His views don’t speak for all black people here in America, but his story as a black citizen of the U.S. (like those of all black Americans) is the most important part of the conversation on race relations that we are attempting to confront as a country. This is a practice in the concept of listening and understanding the plight of others.

Q: If at all, how do you feel being a young black man affects you?

A: It has affected every aspect of my life. The way I walk, that I talk, that I dress and carry myself. I know that when I meet someone I’m not only representing myself but all black men. I try to break those stereotypes and misconceptions that people have about black men or the community as a whole.

Q:Is that pressure ever too much?

A: No, not at all. I am absolutely in love with being black. It's the most beautiful thing. It's something to be proud of without a doubt. It’s hard sometimes, and a lot of pressure but it’s worth it.

Q:What is your earliest memory of your race affecting how people viewed or interacted with you?

A:The first time I saw the culture gap was when I switched to a predominately white middle school. It was all different. The dress code didn’t allow me to wear jeans and things like that, so people would look at me and say, “What is he wearing?” and I’m sitting there looking at all the name brand clothes thinking, “What are you wearing?” I really started to see the misunderstanding between cultures at aht age. People would come up to me and ask, “Oh, do all black people like fried chicken?” or “Is grape kool-aide actually your favorite flavor?” and I just thought, “I mean everyone likes fried food? Grape flavor is okay and all but... who doesn’t like juice?”

Q: As a female, I am brought up a certain way. I was taught to protect myself from dangers typically specific to my gender. But at this point in my life I hardly recognize it as being brought up different from a boy. Can you think of any ways that you have been raised differently or taught certain lessons that your white friends didn’t ever learn?

A: Yes, absolutely! On a regular basis. It’s little things like how I like to see the whole room and be able to read my environment. I’ll sit in a pace that gives me the best vantage point to do that. When I walk into a place I have to be concision of who I'm around. I don’t approach white women when they're alone for any reason at all even if I need help with something. I’m careful to not put myself in a position where anything could be misconstrued and it be my word against someone else’s. Even when I drive I conduct myself differently than some of my white friends do. I don’t ever take the risk of speeding or running lights.

Q: It really sounds like you live a life dominated by extreme caution. Does that feeling of always having to be on your guard build up any resentment?

A: What I hate most is the denial of white privilege. Everyone lives their own life and enjoys different aspects of society and I don’t blame anyone for that, but it's the denial that there is a privilege there that I hate. At least recognize the disparity that exists there.

Q:How do you think our national conversation on this topic and race relations is advancing or not advancing?

A: I feel like it's not talked about enough. And that's not anyone's fault but black people’s. We've become complacent with who we are being treated as. In the years since the civil rights movement, the game has changed but he rules haven't. But we've become okay for so long with how we're treated. We don’t always realize that even though we have individual experiences with racism, we all have a collective one as well. We talk about it to each other, and not even realizing it happens all the time we say, “Oh that was just one time. Just that one person” or we say something is unfair and are answered with, “Well yeah but that's always been bad and we deal with it.”

Q: Being in your position what do you think is your place or your duty in this conversation?

A: We have to continue to criticize and scrutinize institutionalized racism no matter who it comes from-- black people, white people, brown people. It is still time to be vigilant and active. A lot of people say that because we had a black President that means we made it. But really we have so much further to go. We've come along way but we have not arrived.

Q: Some people have discussed colorism being an issue within the black community. Do you see this as a problem in your community?

A: I can break this down. We’ll go all the way back to slave days, because we are experiencing now the repercussions of slavery more than ever. What would happen is the light skin slaves got the better treatment on the plantations. They got to be in the house and take care of the children and eat the better food. That division that those plantation owners created tore us apart as a people and the other slaves didn't hate the master anymore they hated the light skin people getting the better treatment.

When I was younger I only talked to light skin girls and I would even say, “I don't talk to dark girls.” My siblings and I would argue about who was darker like it was the worse thing to be. I grew up and did my research and noticed all these things. I started with my sister. I decided not to call my sister ugly anymore because of her skin, I started finding the beauty in my sister and her skin color and I began to truly appreciate that. Now that I’m older I can see that light or dark or in between black women are magic. Colorism is so often an undertone and we don't even see it.

Q: So, your instagram bio says, “Hella black hella proud.” I loved it when I read it and I want to know what that means to you. What is black culture to you? What about it makes you so proud?

A: Black culture is my everything. Black culture is the epitome of beauty to me. It has a taste of struggle and a sense of overcoming. It's the perfect bittersweet. I couldn't picture myself as anything but black. I hate hearing my bothers and sisters stressing the fact that, “Oh, I'm mixed with, fill in the blank, ” and watering down their identity. The beauty and the heartache and the love that's embedded in the culture is incredible. And everyone sees it but black people and you can tell because other people try to take it like it’s theirs. I wouldn't trade my big lips and my nose for anything. I had to look myself in the mirror for a long time and tell myself that there's nothing more beautiful than me as I am.

Q: When people say that black culture isn’t real or that it is just angry rap music what do you think they are disregarding or missing with that kind of statement?

A: I think it's the biggest slap in the face, honestly. The reasons that black people don't have as much power as we could is because we don't have a nation to stand behind us. We are a culture and a people but we don’t have that homeland to defend us so it’s all seen as less. When China found out that the Chinese were being mistreated here their nation stood behind them and lobbied for that change. We have been disconnected us from our nation. But we're still a people. So for you to say it doesn't exist it strips me of my identity. You were born with freedom. I was given that right after fighting for it. My right to that freedom can be taken away but yours can’t because it’s inherent.

Q: If you were to raise children of your own… what would you want for them?

A: I want my children to not have to struggle like I did. I’m not saying that my life has been the hardest to live compared to other people's. The thing is, to me, stagnant water is poisonous. I don’t see anything wrong with striving for perfection or perfect equality. When I say to my kids that they can be anything they want I want them to actually believe me. I want them to be in a world where whatever they want to be is totally possible if they work for it.

Q: At the end of the day, what grounds you or keeps you hopeful in a society that might look bleak?

A: I look back. I look and think, “What if MLK or Malcolm X said nothing was ever gonna change?” It might not happen today or tomorrow, but it has to come… change has to come.

Q:Lastly, if you could say anything to a young black child what would you want to tell them?