July 20, 2016. That’s the day I fell in love. I fell in love with a boy who loves my broken self, who loves me at my best and at my worst, and who loves me when I don't feel strong enough to love myself.
As Holly Everett so eloquently put it, depression doesn’t care that I'm finally in a healthy relationship with a boy who loves me unconditionally, tells me I’m beautiful, and that he's there for me no matter what. No, no, my depression is still very much there and loves to pop up at the most inconvenient of times.
I am thankful for the good days; the days when I don't feel my depression and forget I even have it. The boy I fell in love with can read me like a book, we can communicate with just a look. He knows when I'm feeling depressed and he's right there waiting patiently. He loves me and my brokenness. He is the most patient, gentle, understanding person I know.
As Holly Everett put it, I wake up every day thinking, “Wow, someone is in love with me. I often think about how lucky I am to be loved, regardless of my flaws in chemistry.” And as Holly Everett said, 'I worry every day that my depression will push him over the edge and push him away." But then I remind myself that my depression does not define me. Our love conquers depression, it is more powerful and more alive than my depression. If you suffer from depression, that does not mean you are incapable of love. In fact, I think it means that you can love harder and feel more deeply. Don't let your depression define you or scare you away from the one you love. The one you love will love you despite your depression; love always conquers depression.