Infinity War is still a heartbreak, and I'm still upset about it.

I'm currently watching the movie again because, clearly, I don't like happiness, and I'm getting upset about everything all over again.

Heimdall and Loki dying? Gamora being killed and not even seeing it coming? Thanos actually being something that you didn't hate but you felt compelled to because he was the villain in the movie?

There are so many things that you can focus on in this movie no matter how many times you watch it.

Any additional time of watching the movie, you get to see different things that you didn't catch the first time that you saw it. And, to top it off, you get to prepare for your favorite parts of the movie like Tony's first transformation in the movie, T'Challa saying "And get this man a shield," and Thor's entrance into Wakanda.

It's all great, and I still love it so much.

But I'm STRESSED.

I know everything that's going to happen, and I still feel like my heart is beating a million times a minute.

It's like I'm forgetting when things have happened in the movie and then I'm being surprised about it all over again.

When does Thanos actually make it to Wakanda?

How much do you love the fact that they actually stood a chance against Thanos? Not much of one, but still significant enough to be mentioned.

Who, along with me, hates Starlord now?

I love Chris Pratt and will continue watching Parks and Rec for as long as I live. But Starlord is going to have to do something really big to make up for all of the disappointment that I just felt for him.

I had so much hope for him. I had so much promise in this movie.

I had so much desire that I wasn't going to be crying every four minutes after a single person's death. But, there I was blubbering like an idiot to everyone's disappointment.

So, if you're like me and you have to watch it multiple times because you enjoy just having your heart broken, I pray for you. Because I just watched Scarlet Witch destroy the mind stone and then Thanos turn everything back and I don't know if I'm going to be able to sleep tonight.

WAKANDA FOREVER

Dread it. Run from it. Destiny still arrives.