So you've realized it. It's been weeks, maybe months now, where your friendship no longer feels normal. I guess you can call this the "friendship breakup." It happens, it's normal, but it sucks. Most of us come across that one friendship that you swear up and down is unbreakable. This friendship is so strong and damn near perfect, to the point that you truly believe it will last forever. However, that sometimes just isn't the case. We grow up and sometimes that means we grow apart, and quite honestly, sometimes it's necessary. If these signs are there, chances are you're going through a friend breakup.
1. They're no longer your go-to
Usually they're the first person you go to. Whether it be relationship issues, family issues, help on an assignment, social drama or even someone you need to talk to just to vent, they're the one. Sadly, this is no longer the case. If anything, sometimes they become the last person you want to talk to about personal matters.
2. It's awkward hanging out.
Remember those times when there was never a dull moment between the two of you? Yeah, now hanging out is almost always one big dull moment. You find yourself having to actually come up with conversation to break the silence. You ask superficial questions about their family, how they're doing, what they've been up to, but after you run out of questions, you realize it's kind of useless.The chemistry isn't there anymore. What used to be important to the both of you is kind of irrelevant now. You have nothing to talk about anymore. Just admit it, it's awkward.
3. They get on your nerves.
Most of the time, you guys were so alike and so invested in the friendship that you rarely saw each other's flaws. You used to finish each other's sentences and say the same things at the same times. You rarely disagreed, and if you did, it was usually easy to compromise. Unfortunately, that's never the case anymore. Each time you hang out, something they do is bound to get under your skin. But you suck it up, because, well, they're your "best friend," right?
4. You haven't seen them in forever.
Days, weeks and maybe even months have gone by since you've last seen them. You used to show up at their house uninvited because well, it was your house, too. Sadly, it's been so long since you've seen them. You practically have to make an appointment to see them again. You used to do pretty much did everything together. Now you've realized you haven't hung out in ages, but it actually doesn't bother you all that much.
5. Your family asks about them.
And honestly, you can't give them a straight answer. You two were so close that your family basically adopted them as their own. It was assumed that they'd be in attendance at any big family events and everything in between. Whether it was Taco Tuesday or movie night, they were there. But slowly but surely, it stopped happening. Their appearance became less and less frequent until finally, it was completely nonexistent. You're not exactly sure what happened, and even if you didn't notice, your family certainly did.
6. The comfort is gone.
At one point, you two were so painfully blunt with each other, but that was OK. There was no need to sugar coat, spare each others feelings and there were no secrets. You two basically shared closets, your house was theirs and vice versa. They've seen you at your absolute worst and your absolute best. You used to fart and burp in each other's faces, call each other foul names and pretty much embarrass each other. But once this is no longer the case, you can safely assume you're growing apart.
7. Life takes its course.
You two are headed down different paths. That distance is almost unavoidable. Maybe you're going away for college and they're staying behind. Maybe they're stuck in the same old, same old and you're tired of it. Whatever the case may be, you two just don't see eye to eye anymore, and life must run its course. It's gotten to the point where trying to accommodate your friendship is a burden that's holding you back from moving forward. If this is where you find yourself, chances are you're growing apart, and it's not a bad thing.
8. Quality over quantity?
Sometimes you acknowledge that your friendship is falling out, but you make efforts to hang out based on the mere fact that you've been friends forever. You feel guilty giving up on a friendship that has been through so much. Because of how long it's been or how fruitful the friendship was, you almost feel an unwanted obligation to this person. Kind of like marriage. Anyway, if this is where you are, just rip the Band-Aid off already. Stop wasting their time and stop wasting yours. It's not a bad thing to move on. Sometimes it's healthier! Cherish those memories you've created together. Hold them dear to your heart, and wish the best for that person. Check in on them from time to time if you feel inclined to do so, but don't try to save your friendship just because you've been friends forever.
9. You have a new best friend.
It's kind of sad to say, but it's a given. If you already have a new best friend, chances are you've moved on and you've grown apart. You're back to square one again, but this time with someone new and that's perfectly OK. People walk in and out of our lives all the time. While it's sometimes painful, it's healthy at the same time. It's important for our growth to find people who support us. Sometimes in order to move forward, you have to leave some things behind. Sadly, friendships might be what need to be left behind. Thankfully, life always finds its way of placing the right people in our lives at the right time. Don't feel bad for finding a new best friend. Just cherish every moment as it comes, and never take that person granted for a second.
Friendships don't always come to an end because of a dramatic, unforgivable event. More commonly, people tend to grow apart naturally. A lot of the time, we meet someone who seems like the perfect friend. Your friendship seems unbreakable and in a lot of ways, this person could easily be your soulmate. While we always wish for the great things to last forever, it just isn't always the case. If you're going through a friendship breakup, don't feel bad. Just because you aren't best friends anymore doesn't mean you can't talk to them. Check in on them from time to time and care from afar. Be thankful for those wonderful memories you made together, and be hopeful for the future to come.
