Breakups hurt. They do. You're losing someone: someone to love and to care for. Someone who loved and cared for you too. In the midst of relationships, you tend to forget what it's like to be alone and after a breakup, you're often tempted to try and find someone new — and do it fast.
Many people don't know how to be alone, how to be single, how to enjoy being single.
They look for affection in others when they really should be focusing on themselves. As cliche as it sounds, you have to learn to love yourself before loving anyone else. If you can't give love to yourself, how can you give love to someone else?
Here are 6 reasons it's so important to stay single for a while after a breakup:
1. You have time to think about the past relationship.
Building relationships with other people is a learning process. Not everything will be perfect, but not everything will go wrong either. After a breakup, staying single gives you time to think about why it ended and provide some closure. Understanding how the breakup ended can also provide insight into how you can be a better partner for someone else in the future.
2. You have time to mourn the past relationship.
Yes! I do mean mourn. Losing someone is heartbreaking and that heart needs to heal. It needs time and space. A broken heart jumping into a new relationship is a recipe for getting hurt.
3. You can now figure out who you are!
Relationships take up a lot of time. When you're not in one, you realize you have tons of extra time! This is a good thing! You can try new hobbies, travel to places you've never been, and get to know yourself! Figure out who you want to be and work toward that.
4. You'll be able to appreciate your family and friends.
Being with your partner all the time can get you sidetracked from realizing the importance and significance of family and friends. These are people who are always going to be there for you! Staying single gives you the opportunity to have fun dinners with your friends and have quality family time you aren't always able to have in relationships. It's important to show them love too!
5. You'll consider what you want in your next relationship.
By staying single, you have time to identify what types of qualities you want in a future partner. Thinking about what worked and what didn't in your past relationship can give you ideas on what type of values, ideas, and characteristics you would want in someone new and longer-lasting.
6. You'll grow independent and self-reliant.
Being single means learning how to do things solo. You learn how to be there for yourself when no one else is. You learn how to take care of yourself. You learn how to not depend on anyone to make you happy, to make you feel beautiful, and to make you feel like you're worth something. You learn to do that all on your own, and that's the most important takeaway.
Once again, not many people know how to be alone. Not many people know how to love themselves without someone else. It takes a very special type of person to stay strong enough to not jump into a new relationship immediately after heartbreak. It takes a very special type of person to stumble upon an article like mine.
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