Stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend. It gets old real fast. I'm always asked if I have a boyfriend or I'm told that I should have one by now. The reactions I get when I say that I'm single are annoying. It's as if I'm suppose to be in a relationship. I'd be lying if I said that I don't I love seeing people happy when they're with their significant other. It gives me hope. On the contrary, I don't need a man to be happy. I can be happy on my own; if I'm to be in a relationship that man will add to my happiness. Just like my father always tells me, "Never put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket."
My standards are high, yes, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with me for being single at 21 years old.
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I've only been in one relationship and trust me, I learned a lot from it. Don't get me wrong I'd love to be with someone and call him my boyfriend but I don't want just anyone.
I've had guys tell me that I'm too good for them or that they don't deserve me and I don't know whether to be flattered or offended. Deep down I wish that the guy would think to step up to the plate. Maybe that's just me and maybe that's a bit harsh. A guy who I genuinely had feelings for told me that I was too good for him and I just thought to myself, "Damn dude really? Stop putting yourself down and step up."
I'm at the point in my life where I don't want to waste my time or anyone else's. If I'm interested in you on that level, you will know. But know this, if I'm not interested in you on that level, you will know that too.
I know what I want.
I'm not going to settle.
I don't want easy. I don't want perfect. An easy and perfect love may be good enough for some but not for me. Love isn't easy. Love isn't perfect. Love, to me, is a beautiful imperfect mess.
With or without someone I'm going to achieve all that I have planned for myself. I know God has the right man picked out for me and at times I wish I knew who he was. But hey, maybe I already do.
You live and you learn. I'm still living and I'm still learning. I have learned to love myself first because if I don't love myself how can I love someone else?
