I'm the Guy That Goes Way too Hard on the Treadmill to Intimidate You From Finishing Your Workout | The Odyssey Online
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I'm the Guy That Goes Way too Hard on the Treadmill to Intimidate You From Finishing Your Workout

Disregard that when you leave, I slow down

Ryan Fan
May 19, 2020
Emory University
44
I'm the Guy That Goes Way too Hard on the Treadmill to Intimidate You From Finishing Your Workout
live.staticflickr.com

You've seen me at your gym before.

I'm the guy that runs on the treadmill and stomps my feet every time I stride to intimidate you from completing your workout.

I'm going fast — really fast. You might have seen me, you know, singing along to my music because it was so easy, sweating profusely and making people around me move because I was sweating all over them.

I want to send a message: I'm a real runner. I'm in shape.

You're not.

You bench-pressing? That's not real exercise. Your five pullups? That's nothing. That leg press? You know who's getting a real leg workout?

Me, running faster and longer than you could ever dream.

You might even see me in the locker room shower, with no qualms about being butt-naked when I go into and out of the shower.

What? I have nothing to be ashamed of, especially given how I showed I deserve to work out much more than you and am much better than you.

Yeah, that's right — I can keep up 15 miles at 5-minute mile pace. I keep it up until you get intimidated and sign up for another gym, so disregard that when you leave, I slow down to 10-minute-mile pace.

I even use incline so my treadmill can make me rise above and tower over you imbeciles. I'm faster than you and better than you. Don't forget that.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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