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I'm Not Sorry For Being Sorry

My apologies are sincere.

Mar 06, 2017

"Why are you apologizing? It's not your fault."
"You say sorry too much."
"If you say you're sorry again..." "Got it. Sorry."

I apologize a lot. It's in my nature, I guess because I find myself saying sorry for things that aren't my fault, for things that are out of my control, for things that I'm not even directly involved in. Just last week I found myself saying sorry to a fellow student when he nearly hit me with his bike.

Recent articles have published suggestions to help people like me stop saying sorry. In social situations, we are told to replace our apologies with "thank yous" as in, instead of saying "I'm sorry I'm late," tell others, "Thank you for your patience."

While this seems like a good way to avoid repeating the same phrase over and over again, I can't bring myself to do it. Because, frankly, I'm not sorry for being sorry.

I am who I am. My personality just so happens to be apologetic in nature. I feel bad for others, and I want to empathize with them, so when I tell you I am sorry, it's not in a dismissive or sarcastic way. I'm genuinely trying to identify with you. I want you to know how sorry I am that you're having a bad day, or that you failed your last exam.

If you think that my apologies are hollow or less meaningful because I say sorry more often than those around me, then you are surely mistaken. Each apology I utter is genuine and relevant to the situation, person, and content I'm dealing with.

I will not change my ways. If I am sorry, then I'm sorry. But I will not be sorry for being sorry. What I feel is valid, and if how I express my feelings doesn't harm you, specifically when this expression is formatted in an apology, then why should it matter?

So the next time someone tells me that I need to stop saying sorry because it makes me appear weak, insincere, or lacking in self confidence, then I'm going to tell them that I am sorry that they feel that way. I'm sorry that their minds have been conditioned to not believe apologies, that they have become wary of those who do apologize, of those who try to empathize and sympathize.

Being empathetic doesn't make people weak. It makes them human. It makes them approachable. And just because it might make them apologize often, it doesn't make them bad people.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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I'm Not Sorry For Being Sorry

My apologies are sincere.

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Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

The ultimate list and gif guide to a college student's brain during finals.

What does the world outside the library look like?

Can I read this entire book tonight?

I should have gone to class more often.

Did the professor even teach this?

What is the lowest grade I can get on this exam and still pass the class?

Should I just drop out of school now?

Finals are ruining Christmas.

Just wrote three sentences so time for a break.

Need. More. Coffee.

What is sleep?

I'm too stupid for college.

Brain hurts.

Time for a Facebook Break.

I think I'm dying.

When will I ever need this information in the real world?

I can't read any of my notes.

I need my mom.

When was the last time I showered?

I need study snacks.

The struggle is so real right now.

"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1. I'm so tired. I need a nap. Maybe I can sleep with my eyes open in class? Or pretend I'm not napping?

2. We have a test today? Why didn't anyone tell me? Did I know this?!

3. Can I quit school yet? It's only October, and I need a vacation.

4. The struggle is so real.

5. I'm so broke. SOS.

6. Stressed? Eat everything you own in your pantry and stuff your face with all your feelings.

7. "Did we have anything due in class today? Homework? Quiz? Test?" "Not that I know of..."

8. I need food. Where is the closest place to get food? I need it stat.

9. This is the longest day of my life. I need a drink, or two, or three.

10. Sleep? What is sleep? What a foreign concept.

11. When someone suggests going and studying in the library, let alone studying in general.

12. When the cafeteria or student center is packed and you can't find a seat anywhere so you literally have to sit in an abandoned corner.

13. When you see someone you used to hook up with. They see you, and approach you; so you have to pretend like everything is normal.

14. When you get your exam and realize you didn't study as much as you should have.

15. When you crush it on an exam or paper that you totally bullshitted.

16. I need a grande, extra strong coffee to get me through today.

17. When the professor announces you have a project due the following week with no instruction on what it's on and how to do it.

18. Is it Friday yet? Where's the weekend when you need it most?

19. It's freezing in here. I feel like I'm sitting in an igloo. I should have brought a jacket or worn long pants.

20. Did I remember my book? Damn, I forgot the book, and of course I need it for that quiz in class.

21. I would pay a million dollars to not go to class today; or actually never again.

22. I need a hoverboard to ride to class. Maybe then I wouldn't be running 15 minutes late to class every day.

23. Oh she/he's cute! I wonder if they're single. Who are they texting? They're BF/GF? I wonder if they think I'm cute. Could they be a potential new bae?

24. Why is there never any parking? I pay thousands of dollars a year for one parking spot to be open.

25. When it feels like you've been in class for an hour and you look at your phone and it has only been five minutes (I'm crying on the inside).

26. When the professor asks if there are any more questions at the end of class and someone raises their hand.

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