I like being off on my own. I like having my own grounds to stomp and conquer. I appreciate having the opportunity to live in an apartment where I can obtain my own space. I value the chance I've been given to establish myself not only through acquiring an education but also the opportunity to get involved in organizations and activities that supplement my various passions.
There's no doubt that I owe it all to my parents. They've provided the opportunity for me to have all of these things.
On that note, I've got to be honest and provide an explanation for a reoccurring phenomenon I have been experiencing over the past year/year and a half.
So, here it is.
The closer I get to graduation, the more I find myself missing my parents.
As a result of missing them, I find myself calling them a couple of times a week as compared to when I used to call them only once every one or two weeks back during freshmen/sophomore year. I find myself leaning on them for advice on the reg, sometimes just wanting to hear their voice and feel like I'm involved in their daily routine at home.
You see, I find comfort and certainty in knowing that they're there — going on with whatever they're doing but supporting me through whatever choices I have to make next. After thinking about it, I realize that the reason for my change in frequency of contact probably has to do with the fact that I recognized that everything is changing--that I didn't entirely appreciate them when I was home, that my time with them is precious and I didn't entirely make that a priority before, that the world keeps turning and they need to know how much I love them.
Some days I find myself wishing I was home to hug my mom and tell her how much I love her because she always listens. On these days, I also want to spend time with my dad by listening to him sing along to his favorite jams as he tells me about his daily life occurrences.
Truth is that more I find the things around me shifting, the more I crave familiarity and relationships that don't waiver. A safe place where I know that however much I will invest will be returned. A spot where I will feel truly loved and appreciated for who I am becoming.
We all find our sanctuary in different things and at various times in our life. I've been fortunate enough to discover those places through some pretty steady friendships I've made at Auburn, but my parents are always the ones I go back to.
The reason why: Because they've seen me through every single stage of life. Because they've loved me through diaper changes, fights with my brothers as a toddler, craft parties at school, middle school friend drama, the challenges of puberty, high-school identity crisis, college transitions.
I could go on and on. Point is, they know me better than anyone and they believe in me even when I feel like a failure. Even when I've been ugly to them and don't deserve their love.
They truly know me. They believe in me.
And through this roller-coaster of unpredictability, they're my rock-solid source of love, hope, support, and encouragement that I lean on in this stage of life. I wouldn't have it any other way.
So, if you're almost finished with college or just an adult who finds themselves missing their parents like crazy sometimes, there's nothing wrong with you. In fact, this may be the most valid time of your life to love them more than ever before.
