1. Don't judge me for my late night stress snacking
2. I don't like when you play your music because then I can't play my music
3. Why do you have people over every time I want to take a depression nap
4. I'm going to get mad at you for being loud even though I can go to an empty study lounge next door
5. You can't eat my food even though I finished two pints of your ice cream last week
6. Are you cooking dinner tonight? I'll be sure to order fast food
7. The amount of time you take in the bathroom is almost as long as mine and that annoys me
8. Can you and your friends leave so I can poop
9. I don't have to do the dishes if I don't have any, right? They're all your's so...
10. I know we don't talk much but is it weird if I vent to you? I rarely get emotional but tonight I'm just so moody and needy
11. Do you judge me for staying in my room all day
12. Why do you have people over all the time? Stop making me feel bad for having an inactive social life
13. Yes, I'm eating a box of Pop-Tarts alone in my room for dinner, and no, I don't want to share a salad with you
14. Can you look at this rash and tell me if I should go to the doctor? I would send a pic to my mom but I get paranoid about sending pics of my body
15. Are we friends?
16. How do you describe me to your friends? Do they think I'm the bad roommate?
17. Do we stay in contact after our lease ends?
18. Do you like living with me?
19. Am I bearable?
20. Does it look like I want to have a conversion when my door is closed, and I avoid eye contact with you
21. I get annoyed at you for things that are out of your control. Like when I forget my keys, why aren't you home? What are you doing that's more important than helping out your roomie in need?
22. Do you hear my farts? I never hear yours so I just assume you're an abnormal super human who doesn't fart or do anything gross
23. I've never seen you wear sweatpants and I'm confused? How are you always dressed up? At 7:00 in the morning?
24. If I come home drunk will you be able to wake up to hold my hair?