You may have heard the phrase that if you love something, let it go. Unfortunately, this is true. Breaking up with someone is one of the hardest things that a person has to do especially if that person is one you've spent a majority of your life with. It's not the fact that you won't have that person to lean on anymore, it's that you now have to turn the one life you had together into two lives that are lived apart.
The thought of having to face reality on your own is scary. I believe this is why so many people find it easy to fall back into the same routine that they know is best left behind. You want so badly to forgive the fact that the bad in the person you so dearly loved outweighs the good that you rarely were able to see. This is why your heart endures so much sadness from someone you only want to be happy with.
Leaving someone behind has to start with you learning why you left them. Maybe they were never the person you were expecting them to be, maybe they treated you terrible, or maybe you just didn't see yourself marrying them in the future. Whatever your reasoning, you have to realize that it was for the best.
The sad thing about loving someone, is that sometimes you just can't show them how much you love them. They are unappreciative of the love you are willing to give them and you don't deserve that. You don't deserve someone who doesn't want to give you the same amount of love and affection that you are willing to give them. You don't deserve someone who treats you disrespectfully and you sure don't deserve someone who doesn't look past your flaws to see the beauty of your personality.
If you love him, let him go. Maybe he'll find himself and see that you were the best thing that ever happened to him, or maybe he won't. Just know that whatever happens the moment you decide its time to call it quits, happens for the sake of your well being.
Prepare yourself for the moment you decided to be on your own by staying positive and focusing on the love that you really want. The love that you are able to share equally with someone. The love that you know is real and doesn't feel like it is bringing you down. Know your worth. Only then will you find the deeper, healthier love that you've searched your whole life for
