A few months ago, I was bored during quarantine and tired of introducing myself on dating apps. Instead, I created an "application" – a Google Form to send to my matches to break the ice. I had them answer basic questions – name, hometown, major – then asked them what was their "ideal first date" and to describe themselves. While some responses made me contemplate deleting dating apps altogether, some of their replies were really reassuring.
The Good
"I feel like everybody tries too hard on a first date... I personally love the beach so I'd probably order food, pick you up, head to the beach, find a nice spot to chill, hang out, listen to some music, and eat some delicious food"
"Whatever makes you happy."
"You, me, I pick you up (obviously opening the door for you) then we drive to dinner while we make awkward conversation and you make fun of my driving. Then we go to dinner, I continuously stutter because I'm nervous and you judge me hard asking yourself what's wrong with me. Then after some more odd conversation and dinner we go get ice cream and walk on the beach watching the beautiful sunset. At this moment you realize that maybe I'm not so bad and I'm pretty cool or maybe not but that's OK. Then I'll drive you home as we listen to my shit playlist. Then we arrive at your residence and we have an awkward goodbye and you'll wonder once again if I have mental issues (fun fact: I don't). You'll say to your self that you'll never see me again but at that moment I'll whip out my phone and show you my dog and you instantly fall in love with me and the rest is history."
"This is gonna sound unoriginal but I always let the girl decide I don't really care what we do if I'm w/ my boo."
"I pick you up, we go have a nice lunch together maybe at an outdoor restaurant or grab some food to go and picnic outside at a park or the beach. Eat, chill and get to know one another and talk for a while before you make the decision if you wanna go to dinner or if you want me to just take you home. I'm gonna say you enjoy talking and getting to know me so we go to dinner. Not a super expensive meal, but a meal that you'll remember. Maybe a nice Italian restaurant and obviously the check is on me because I try to be a gentleman. After dinner, we'll drive around a bit and let you listen to my taste in music. Then I'll drop you off back home, and hope you'll want to go on a second date."
"Anything with u."
The Bad
"Unsure lol."
"This could go so many ways but rn my ideal date would be going out to eat then going shopping at high-end stores and looking at stuff we can't afford but wish we had. Then going to a frat (or club)."
"Booze and food."
"Wherever she doesn't like, that way if she has a good time then she'll know I'm legit."
"Sex."
"Crucifixion."
"I pull up to your crib and you pay for my Uber and you SUCK THE SOUL OUT OF THE KID."
"Idk but alcohol is dope so that'd be fun."
" Walk around Washington Square Park not wearing masks or gloves to scare everyone."
"Getting laid."
Skydiving.
"In my bed."
"Kissing on the jouch."
"Question left blank."
The Funny
"Ur mom's house."
"Mosh pit @ Playboi Carti's Rolling Loud set."
"Quarantine and chill."
"What is my perfect first date? We break into Maggie's at midnight. Do we go for the vault? No, we go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, you look at me. You tell me to stop. It's your father's business. You're Maggie. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell you to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust you. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell you to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. You've been waiting for me all these years. You've never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier."
"Me, you, the top of a small paper company, eating grilled cheese, watching a fireworks show."
"Watching your house burn down."
"Adventure somewhere like actually doing something."
"Idk because quarantine."
"Idk because quarantine."
"Well I guess In this time, a zoom call lol."
"What the fuck am I doing ?"
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