Competing in the singles division of ladies' figure skating called for a bit of narcissism. Whether it was restraining my nerves or scoping out the competition, my thoughts were solely about personal success. I'm an initiator by nature, so whenever I made a decision that ended up being successful, it boosted my ego. I figured that being full of myself was a good thing... At least until I was forced to face the icy reality of my ninth-grade English project.
The basis of the project was simple. My group members and I simply had to create the main aspects of a country's economic, educational and governmental system. The only catch: we had to collaborate on every single part of the country's components. The premises of the assignment demanded that each member shares equal knowledge on each aspect. In simpler terms; "divide and conquer" was not acceptable here. I was left in unfamiliar territory. How could I become a team player after years of solo training?
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Logically, I should have gone along with my peers and collaborated with their ideas. Anyone with common sense could've seen that working together would lighten the load. However, I took to the project with the morals of a ruthless competitor. The project became a race for me to claim all the points for myself. My ideas were fundamentally underdeveloped due to me stretching my skills too thinly over the project's components. My group members tried to reason with me to no avail. I was engulfed in finishing the job. Time was closing in as the project's deadline approached. My distanced group had left me to my own devices and I continued contemptuously. It seemed like I was destined for failure until my English teacher intervened.
One week before the project was due, my group members and I were called into her office. I, fully wrapped up in an all-knowing haze, felt a blow, not unlike a concussion when I realized that my teacher had organized this meeting for me to apologize. She stated very simply that I couldn't accomplish anything alone. I gaped at her. What had I done wrong by taking the initiative to work hard? I refused to comment on anything she suggested for me to say to the others and stormed out of her office.
The moral of the story is, I failed my English project with a big, fat zero. When we received our evaluations back, all marks on my work were fine. However, the explanation for my final grade came down to a single phrase in red ink. "Unacceptable display of work ethic." Turning the frustration to my teacher, she simply shook her head at me and pointed in the direction of my group members. At last, my tunnel vision of success crumbled. I can't even begin to describe the humiliation and rush of embarrassment I felt when the blinds peeled off my perspective.
As I reflected upon the zero weighing down my grade, I knew that an apology was long overdue. I trudged over to my group members and took credit for my ill practice. Thankfully, our reconciliation was much more civil than my previous behavior. The project's outcome helped me get my head on straight.
Athletes can be rather self-absorbed. It makes perfect sense; out on the ice, you're the only person you can rely on for success. Judges will score you based solely on your performance on that single point in time. However, it's important to distinguish between competition and collaboration. I learned that it was not only acceptable to trust someone else's opinion, but that working together with others would literally create a better product in the end. Moving forward, I kept that in mind as I returned to the ice a more friendly skater and to the classroom a more open-minded partner.
Classes return inevitably. It’s up to you what kind of student you choose to be.
