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I Watched Baywatch For 24 Hours Straight.

And Here's What I Learned.

Amanda Cattel

Jul 28, 2022

University of Central Florida

304

I Watched Baywatch For 24 Hours Straight.

Photo by Jernej Graj on Unsplash

1. The episodes are 30% dialogue and 70% montage.

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"Baywatch" opens every episode with a montage. It usually consists of people on the beach, surfing, swimming, talking or playing volleyball. Long grazing shots of beautiful women in bikinis are depicted while a thundering soundtrack of electronic bass plays out. Once a plotline has been established, more montages are inserted. As a result, it feels like each episode is 3 hours long.

2. Everyone is hot...unless they're evil.

The doctors, the mailmen and the policemen are all handsome muscular men.

3. Pamela Anderson made her "Baywatch" debut by playing a saxophone.

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At first, I thought Pamela Anderson would burst onto the screen in the iconic red bathing suit in the first episode of the first season. Instead, I had to wait until season 3 for the actress to appear, playing a saxophone, on a rock, in a river.

4. There are some feminist undertones.

"Baywatch" sort of balances out the objectification of attractive women in bikinis by illustrating strong female friendships. For instance, during a lifeguard tryout, two female characters stuck together in o

5. Plot points are immediately dropped once someone is rescued.

This was an immediate realization during my private watch party. In one episode, a relaxing, fun- filled day at the beach quickly turned traumatic when swimmers were being attacked by a wild sprawl of jellyfish. There was blood, skin infections and crying women. I was intrigued as to how this event will be solved. Will David Hasselhoff unzip his swim trunks and urinate? (This is a common medicinal cure for jellyfish stings.)

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I Watched Baywatch For 24 Hours Straight.

And Here's What I Learned.

In This Article:

1. The episodes are 30% dialogue and 70% montage.

2. Everyone is hot...unless they're evil.

3. Pamela Anderson made her "Baywatch" debut by playing a saxophone.

4. There are some feminist undertones.

5. Plot points are immediately dropped once someone is rescued.

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No one best represents the struggle like our favorite 90s squad.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

2. When there is only one section of a popular course.

3. Receiving the 18,000 emails reminding you to register ASAP.

4. When you need to see an advisor, but they are too busy/unresponsive.

5. Trying not to dress like a bum for your appointments with your advisors/department heads.

6. When you have a perfectly planned out schedule, and one class ruins it.

7. Carefully moving things around to accommodate a different class/section.

8. Waking up at 6:00 a.m. for your enrollment time.

9. Concocting a new schedule at your enrollment time after your original plan gets changed.

10. Getting into a class and filling the last available seat.

11. When all of your classes finally go through.

12. Realizing that you forgot a class that was a pre-requisite for everything else.

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."

What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?

What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?

What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?

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1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

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