Books have been and always will be everything for me. I mean, books are basically my major. I used to eat books up when I was younger. I'm not entirely sure what happened, though.
I'd like to think high school happened. That being an honors student was so time-consuming, and it really was. Or perhaps life itself happened. Not necessarily drama or bad things, but so many things happen in life and you forget to take the time to just get out of your world for a moment.
I can blame it on these things and probably a bunch of other things, but the fact still remains: I haven't sat down to read a good book in a long time. Reading books were different when I was twelve years old, compared to being a 20-year-old college student. Being twelve, all I was worried about were One Direction, Justin Bieber, and what new books I was going to read. When you have all the time in the world, what else is a middle schooler to do?
I used to stay up until 8 in the morning reading YA dystopian novels and dreaming of how cute Peeta and Katniss were. Now, my mind can't quiet down long enough to understand the sentence I just read. There are a million thoughts a minute running in my mind so it's not as easy for me to focus anymore. Now I worry about school and work and bills and socializing.
I miss it though. I miss how enveloped I would get into a book, where I couldn't hear a single sound around me. I miss how I used to read books like I was breathing air; I can barely even get through a picture book now.
Reading when I was growing up taught me patience, gave me imagination and overall just made me happy. I want to feel the same way I did when I used to read books back-to-back. I want to be able to shut the world and my thoughts out and just focus on the protagonist's story.
To lose touch with reading feels like losing touch with such an integral part of myself. A lot of times, I feel like the worst English major ever. I don't read much anymore and it's hard to be at peace with that. I want to read again because I loved it so much. I've yet to find a passion for something like I've had with reading.
I think if anyone else feels this way, a goal should begin. Not even a goal. A plan should be made. Plan to dedicate a part of your day to this passion. Put yourself in a comfortable environment that'll allow you to dive into the books you want to read. Reading is a commitment and I'm going to commit to this.
