There is only one thing that I believe is absolutely necessary for my life and that is to someday have children. My dream is to have multiple children living their lives, creating memories and finding a safe haven in my home.
From what I have seen over the years, I realize that being a parent is not always a fun or positive experience.
It can be tough from the terrible twos, to when children hit puberty, all the way to adulthood when they constantly call you for help on "adulting."
Despite all the inconveniences or tough days of being a parent, I still would love to have children and it is the one thing I am sure of. With that being said, I do not necessarily want or need these children to be biologically mine.
I have the desire to someday adopt or foster children.
I have had this dream since I was in about 4th grade.
I met a girl and we instantly hit it off as best friends.
Over time I found out that she was a foster child and that soon her foster parents wanted to adopt her and her brother. Throughout her years in the foster care system, she endured a lot of heartache and other negative experiences.
I saw that she appreciated her newfound family and she always said she was grateful. I know she always hoped for a family to take her and her brother in and treat them the way they were meant to be treated.
Now, they are loved and cared for immensely.
However, this is not the same story for the other 100,000 children (not including foreign countries) that are eligible and awaiting adoption.
That is over 100,000 kids who need somewhere comfortable to stay.
Adoption hasn't always been a set plan in my head. What really resonated with me was in recent years when I heard a poem on "The Fosters" that said,
" I didn't give you the gift of life, but in my heart, I know. The love I feel is deep and real as if it had been so. For us to have each other is like a dream come true! No, I didn't give you the gift of life, life gave me the gift of you."
I do not want to adopt children because I feel like I am "saving them." I do not want to adopt children and make them feel like they owe me anything for adopting them.
I want to adopt children so I can love them, provide for them and nurture them.
In return, I know in my heart and soul that my life will be complete, thanks to them.
While I would also want to give birth to a child, I also want to adopt. A child does not have to be biologically mine for me to give them the same amount of love.
I hope to someday cherish and love children whether they share my DNA or not. Whether they grew in me for 9 months or not. Whether they look like me or not.
Blood does not determine love.
Sure, there are plenty of complications when it comes to the adoption process. I oftentimes hear that the process is long and quite expensive.
People are concerned about the mental and physical health issues children in the system may have. Some people hold these fears close to them and it veers them away from wanting to adopt.
These fears and concerns are fair, but to me, the end goal is all that matters.
I want all children, from all walks of life to have a fair chance of having a support system. I want all children to feel like they have a chance at finding a home.
Yes, adoption is a long process. Yes, it is expensive and maybe not for everyone.
But it is for me.