I Thought You Were The One For Me, But Then I Realized The One For Me Would Think That Too | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

I Thought You Were The One For Me, But Then I Realized The One For Me Would Think That Too

They say that if you can't go a day without thinking about someone, or if your time apart was forced, then that person belongs in your life. Then they also say, if he wanted to be with you he would have already- now go love yourself.

817
I Thought You Were The One For Me, But Then I Realized The One For Me Would Think That Too

We were so young when we crossed paths. That tiny detail should have made it easier for me to pretend that what we had was something I can brush aside as childish. But that detail made it harder for me to do so. When you're young, you are your most real and genuine self. You knew me when I was a blank canvas. Nothing too bad had happened to me yet, and I opened my heart up as if I had never been hurt because I hadn't. Although I was always guarded, this version of me that you knew was my most open, innocent, and authentic self. I was full of light and love because I didn't know any better. This version of me will never come back.

The quotes on my explore page on Instagram always scare me. When I read them I always feel like they are talking to me about you. They say that if you can't go a day without thinking about someone, or if your time apart was forced, then that person belongs in your life. Then they also say, if he wanted to be with you he would have already – now go love yourself. I think the saddest thing I had to do, was to force myself to believe that despite everything you said, you didn't actually care about me. That I shouldn't keep catering to your feelings, because the general public would agree that you are just using me when you're down and need an emotional boost. It's hard for me to paint you like that, but if I don't hold onto these thoughts then I can't live with the situation too well.

Our separation was the definition of forced.

Although you moved across the country, we really couldn't leave each other alone. Even if I avoided talking to you or looking at your pictures, your face was always in my mind's eye. You truly haunted me. I'm sad to admit it, but to this day, not a day has passed that I haven't thought about you. I don't think you will ever understand how years ago when I said that I know we are the one for each other, it was so obvious to me that it might as well have been written down in a textbook, as an inarguable fact of the universe. I thought that nothing could change my mind but there was one thing that managed to do so.

That one thing is the fact that you didn't agree with me. I think on some level you could have known and you still didn't do anything about it, and that's almost worse. It got to the point that I was tired of being someone you were okay with losing. I was so sick of you admitting that no one will ever compare to me, just to continue letting me escape you. You never manned up. You have admitted that I'm the best you will ever have, yet I had to witness you settling.

I remember when you called me, unsure about being with her. I knew it was because you thought... maybe you were meant to be with me, but the fact you were even questioning it meant you still weren't ready for all that I have to offer. You weren't willing to put in the work to earn me, and if I fell for your words, I knew that I was about to be in for a huge disappointment. I had already been through enough heartbreak with you and I was done. For the first time, I honored myself and my worth. I went against everything I had wanted for so long and pushed you back to her. It tore me apart, but I also knew you didn't deserve me. I knew you could pretend that she's the one for you, put in a lot less work, and find happiness. If you couldn't see how special I was before, what would make this time any different? The man for me wouldn't make me pry them from the hands of someone else. Your lady is young and innocent like I was, and I'm not going to be the one that causes her to age quickly from heartbreak. It should've been obvious to you that there's a reason you keep running back to me. However I tried to spell it out to you years ago and you never listened, so now you have to learn the hard way. It's not my job to make you see that I'm the one that got away.

The fact that you could never admit to yourself what was so clearly in front of you, made me change my mind about you being "the one." I'm no cupid, but I don't think the one for me would torture me and themselves the way you do.

Maybe one day you will realize that you're still lying to yourself. It will be too little too late then because I've finally found someone to love more than you; someone I should've loved this whole time. I finally choose to love me. Realistically I know my love for you will never completely disappear, but it does have an expiration date. It's getting stale, and soon it will be covered in mold: unrecognizable from what it once was.
Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

190019
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

14784
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

457766
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

26583
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments