Ernest Hemingway once said "there is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed," and I have always found this saying very relatable. Writing for me is not just a hobby I decided to do in my free time, I am not just writing for this website in hopes of getting the most likes and shares, it's deeper than that.
I write because my inner voice so badly wants to be heard, I write because sometimes it's the only way I can calm my racing thoughts, I write because I don't have a choice.
I have never written anything light, I always write about the heavy dark stuff that no one wants to talk about. I use to run a recovery blog where I would post bimonthly about some of the same subjects I talk about here, but on a more personal level. I felt like I benefited a lot from this and it was a way to talk to my family and friends without directly talking to them.
But as months went by it seemed like my recovery from self harm became more of a me wanting people to be proud of me, and I do want that, but I also want to be proud of myself and it felt like I was just trying to recover for the positive attention and less for myself. I deleted that blog not too long ago because, in the grand scheme of things, recovery should be about me and not about everyone's reaction to me.
I have learned that writing is something that can't be forced and it's something that has to feel genuine to me. And yeah sometimes I struggle to pick a topic to write my articles about, but I have to really feel like I am showing my authentic feelings in the article before it is ever submitted.
I feel like the Odyssey is full of articles about college and heartbreak, but no one seems to want to talk about what goes on behind the scenes, no one wants to talk about mental illness because it isn't beautiful or poetic and no one can make it seem that way.
Writing has and continues to save my life. It has helped me move toward a better me. It has helped me open up to people. It has helped me become who I am today. I can't imagine not writing. I think everyone eventually finds a passion like that.
Something that touches them so deeply that they can't imagine life without it.
Some people play a sport or an instrument, some people can sing or dance, some people can paint beautiful pictures. I write.
