6 months ago, my life was a wreck. I had to move home from across the country, where I was going to college and showing on an equestrian team. I was in a place where I hated waking up to the kind of life I was living. I didn't want to move home, but I knew I couldn't stay where I was, or nothing would change.
A couple weeks later, I got hired as an instructor at a day program for disabled adults. I really had no idea what I was signing up for, but I knew that I wanted a positive change. What I didn't know, was all the ways this job would change my life.
For the first time, ever, I clocked out every day with a smile on my face. I would hangout with these happy, quirky, carefree, loving people who cracked me up all day long. I discovered so many personalities in the people around me, and I found the more I discovered, the more I wanted to know. I wanted to know their history, their conditions, their passions and hopes. And once I reached that point, it changed my whole perspective about my own life.
People who are disabled aren't treated like the rest of us. They aren't given choices of what they want to do, whenever they want to do it. They can't drive to a friend's house after work or run to In N' Out for animal fries when they have a craving at 10 pm. They don't get to just grab wine and chocolate when they've had a bad day, or marry their best friend, or get away with going off on Amazon's customer service representative because many of them don't even have their own computer to access Amazon from.
Other humans stare at them when they're out in public, or badger them with rules and reminders all day long. Kids make fun of them, people abuse and take advantage of them, and in many cases, those people are their loved ones. Many of their diets are regulated by someone else, they have families who never call or see them, they don't control how much money they make, and most of the time it's not even enough. Many people with disabilities have backgrounds that have put me in tears and were treated in ways I could never imagine having to endure.
Society casts them out. They're different. They're scary, they're not normal. They make everyone nervous. So we stick them all together so we don't have to deal with them, because, really, it is SUCH an inconvenience.
Except it's not. It's inspiring, it's uplifting and meaningful and beautiful and perfect, all at once. When I walk through those doors in the morning, it's like I'm a celebrity. It doesn't matter to them if I walk in with makeup on, or if I come in looking like I got hit by a train. When we go on outings, they don't care what kind of car I drive, or what kind of music I listen to. They are happy just to spend time with me. When they ask me how I'm doing, they genuinely want to know the answer, because they care. How many people can we really say that about?
The people at my work love me because I matter to them. They consider me a friend because I treat them with respect and attentiveness, and when you grow up in a world where that's scarce, they value it to a fault.
These people are the most loving, giving, happy human beings I have ever known. There have been days they've spent all their time in program making me something to take home, just because I am their friend. They tell me they love me, even on the days I feel as if I have fallen short.
The smallest things make them happy. Something as simple as painting their nails, or listening to the same song two whole times in the car, because they don't have their own radio at home. I can bring cookies in once a month and you would think I was handing out hundred dollar bills.
I love working in this field. I love it because I never get yelled at for not meeting someone's expectations, I never have to deal with people who are rude to me, I get to laugh every day, create projects, discover new ideas, goof off with the happiest and most appreciative people I have ever known, and feel a kind love and community I could never find out in "the real world".
I love that I can come to work and be exactly who I am, and that be enough. I love that I am surrounded by people who aren't afraid to be themselves, even when society tells them that who they are doesn't measure up. I love the generosity, the encouragement and the happiness these people bring to my life, every single day that I am here. I love how positive-minded they are and how simply and beautifully they see the world around them.
In all the ways the world tells us that disabled people are society's flaws, I disagree. I wish we could be more like them. Genuine, optimistic, simple and compassionate. They value the very things we take for granted, things like love and freedom, friends and health. They aren't consumed by greed, money, getting ahead, or even their setbacks. They show up ready to live, ready to absorb all this world has to offer, every day.
This job has saved my life in ways that I sometimes cannot even comprehend. And I have every single client in my building to thank for that. So thank you, to each of you, for showing me the kind of person I hope to be. I admire you more than you will ever know, and I hope one day the world will lead by your example.
