Recently I read an interesting article that stated we are in a global uncivilized war that has spurred on social movements, the likes of #blacklivesmatter and #metoo and I agree. But I hear you saying what has this got to do with training your boss and being passed up for promotions? How are the two even related.

Well, In my previous job, I had a really traumatic experience with a horrible leader that forever changed me for the better. I wrote about it in some of my articles. But basically I am so thankful for the experience because it made me evaluate what I will and will not put up with. Better I evaluated what I wanted in life. In high pressure, high stress, high delivery jobs it's often difficult to navigate the office politics that exist. When you add to that the balance of wanting a home life, battling the stigmas of being black in corporate America, (which under the Trump era is way worst) and being a woman well the odds, can be stacked against you. The pressure can be insurmountable and putting career 1st can often make you less present in all the other facets of your life so if the sacrifice is made, you better be damn sure it is worth it. This was never truer for me than in my recent attempts at career progression. I applied for a job that was a logical career progression for me. In the end, my VP told me because I was a wife and mother and it would involve travelling that was the reason, I couldnt be given the job so it got me thinking about why women are often passed up for career progressing roles and here is what I came up with;

1. Sharing your personal life. The biggest mistake I made is this role is being hired by a friend who divulged early on that I was married and had 2 kids. When she subsequently quit, this was already common knowledge and weaponized against me when I went for this promotion.

2. We are emotional

Now I am not an emotional type. I have the attitude of never let them see you sweat. It is rare that I will show open emotion rather, more likely, I just shut down but women have all too often been accused of being emotional and I call bullshit. At times the trauma of what one experiences at work, from the victim of a powerful boss who wants to overstretch their power, to the black woman who is subjected

day in day out to systematic oppression designed to strip you of your dignity but you have to put up with it because hey you need a paycheck and so much more. Is it any wonder every now and then you want to show emotion?

3. We are not equipped. The lack of testosterone running through our veins somehow makes us less equipped, less able than our male counterparts who are often aggressive and

Now to the point of this article. These reasons, primarily number 1 in my case is why I was passed up for a promotion. The irony is, that my VP is a recent Dad who travels just as much. And in spite being passed up for the role, I have been on the road just as much of not more. Away from my family which was the reason given for not getting it.

In addition, he hire a single male no kids into the role. But he his experience us questionable to me and he has no sense. On top of that I have to teach him, what a bitch. He has requested to attend all my calls, all my meetings, be on all my emails. At 1st I thought he was a micromanager but recently realized when questioned about expert topics that someone with his "experience" should know, he is clueless. Now in that kind of scenario here's how you train him...

1. Provide weekly reports. This will give him/her timely snapshot of what's happening week by week

2. Hold weekly meetings and provide information that maybe missing to allow him/her to have their finger on the pulse

3. Do you best to make him look good. Lend a hand, bring him up to speed, help him succed.

Now these are the things we should do but it can be so hard. When in doubt just pray about the situation and leave if you must.

That's my advise folks