Chances are you know someone who is afflicted with depression. It is the most common mental health disorder, affecting an estimate of 300,000,000 people worldwide. Those numbers are speculative, as there are still many developing countries who do not have the means to properly diagnose it. It is estimated that 75% of mental health issues go undiagnosed in developing countries, with a whopping 1,000,000 people committing suicide EACH YEAR.
People with depression do not typically advertise their affliction. I can only speak from my personal perspective, but I live with depression, and it is something I have had to come to terms with before I could ever talk about it openly. Even after acknowledging I had something that was preventing me from living my life to its fullest, I was hesitant to talk about it.
Mental health is something that makes a lot of people uncomfortable. In our society we teach boys to "man up" when things are tough and we tell girls that "big girls don't cry." These hackneyed sayings take root in the still-forming minds of children, who grow up thinking that if there is something wrong internally, they are just not being strong enough. With enough gumption and can-do attitude, they can stop "feeling sorry for themselves."
Living with depression is like living with a brick wall separating you from happiness. No amount of trying to make yourself feel better is going to get you through that brick wall. You can't go around it and you can't go over it, so you become stuck, unable to reach a that feeling of normalcy. Not everyone has happy and productive days all the time, but they do happen. When you live with depression, you have fewer of those days, if any at all.
If you think someone you know is dealing with depression, the best advice I can give you is to listen to them. When you are depressed, you are talked at quite a lot. People tell you to just feel better, or to exercise more, or to get more sun (I have had that thrown at me a couple times when I talked about my depression. What am I, a houseplant?). The best thing to do is to ask them if they are alright and truly listen to what they have to say. Internalize what they are telling you, think it over, then tell them that you understand (or if you don't, ask them to explain). You don't need to have an answer or explanation for why they are feeling the way that they are, you just need to show your support.
You don't need to have an answer or explanation for why they are feeling the way that they are, you just need to show your support.
There is no simple solution for depression. In some cases, medication will help make a patient feel more normal, while others can find solace in individual or group therapy. The one thing that is for certain is that everyone who is afflicted with depression appreciates a helping hand from a friend or loved one. A simple check-in to ask if that person is alright and to let them know that you are available to listen is sometimes enough.
If you are reading this and you are afflicted by depression, anxiety, and/or other mental health disorders, talk to your doctor or to someone you know and trust. If you are contemplating suicide, please please PLEASE talk to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255. Mental disorders can distort a person's perception of reality. It is our duty to help those who may not have a strong support system.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Resources for getting mental health help if you cannot afford it:
