It's Time For You To Love Yourself, Not Someone Else | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post

It's Time For You To Love Yourself, Not Someone Else

Grow into who you want to be, not who you want to be with.

286
It's Time For You To Love Yourself, Not Someone Else
Laura Marques

The first article I wrote this year was entitled, “For Those Who Can’t Let Go Of An Impossible Love.” This is meant to be a continuation of that article. A compilation, if you will, of how I stand in that situation now. Let me say first, it’s okay to let go, now.

I always thought there was another chapter left in my book of someone. Not a journal, or a literary book of any sort, but the little story that you’re writing in your head all of the time. The thoughts that guide you; the whispers that may hurt you. It’s hard to get out of your head, but it’s time that you must. It’s time we all started becoming who we’re supposed to be, not figuring out who we’re supposed to be with.

If this person sparked something in you that you cannot forget, don’t. Yet, know that they did not come back and rekindle the flame, even though they probably knew you were still waiting for them. If this person filled your thoughts, let them flitter through every once in a while, but focus on building your other connections instead. They probably knew how much you thought of them, too.

No one is completely blind to the tricks of others. We can see them ensnaring new victims into their web, knowing exactly how that fly is gonna feel when it gets spit back out again. We see them cast their web, and we try our best not to get snaked back into their world, but it proves fruitless. How is this fair to us?

How can we do ourselves justice if we’re so consumed with someone else?


Not to say that this is a piece about love—in reality, I meant for it to be about self-growth—but sometimes the perfect love for you is waiting when you least expect it. My best friend, for example, got out of a terrible relationship last spring.

Not worth the gory details, but it ended with her deciding that she was done with men (with dating) for the next while. I didn’t know her well at the time, but I knew her to be carefree and energetic, and she loved to dance. One night, a couple days after she made her declaration against sex, she met this kinda awkward cute guy.

They’ve been dating for over eight months now, which for college, feels like an eternity. My point with this anecdote is not to tell you that maybe the perfect love for you is sitting right where you can’t see it, because maybe it’s not. Maybe you’ve already found the perfect person, but there just hasn’t been any room for it to work out.

Either way, don’t consume yourself with the feelings of one. There are seven billion people on this planet, and you only know a handful of them. Spend some time making new connections and starting new memories, don’t get hung up on the old ones. Grow into who you want to be, not who you want to be with.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

A Few Thoughts Every College Freshman Has

The transition into adulthood is never easy

14460
Mays Island
Courtney Jones

Today I started my third week of college at Minnesota State Moorhead. I have survived welcome week, finding my classes on the first day, and being an awkward loner in the dining hall. Even though I have yet to be here for a month, I have already experienced many thoughts and problems that only a new college student can relate to.

Keep Reading...Show less
college

"Make sure to get involved when you're in college!"

We've all heard some variation of this phrase, whether it came from parents, other family members, friends, RAs, or college-related articles. And, like many clichés, it's true for the most part. Getting involved during your college years can help you make friends, build your resume, and feel connected to your campus. However, these commitments can get stressful if you're dealing with personal issues, need to work, or aren't sure how to balance classes and everything else going on during the semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

9 Reasons Why Friends Are Essential In College

College without friends is like peanut butter without jelly.

6284
Bridgaline Liberati and friends
Bridgaline Liberati

In college, one of the essential things to have is friends. Yes, textbooks, a laptop, and other school supplies are important but friends are essential. Friends are that support system everybody needs. The more friends you have the better the support system you have. But you also have someone to share experiences with. And don’t settle for just one or two friends because 8 out of 10 times they are busy and you are studying all alone. Or they have other friend groups that do not include you. Don’t settle for just one or two friends; make as many friends as you can. After the first couple of weeks of college, most friend groups are set and you may be without friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Power of Dressing Up

Why it pays to leave the hoodie at home.

4635
sneakers and heels
Sister | Brother Style - Word Press

For a moment your world is spinning. The phone alarm has just scared you awake and you’re flooded by daunting thoughts of the day ahead. You have three assignments due and little time to work on them because of your job. You’re running late because you’ve hit snooze one to many times after yesterday’s long hours. You dizzily reach for a hoodie, craving its comfort, and rush for a speedy exit, praying you will have time to pick up coffee. Does this sound familiar?

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Signs You Live At The Library As Told by 'Parks And Recreation'

A few signs that you may live in the library whether you'd like to admit it or not.

4070
brown wooden book shelves with books

Finals week is upon us. It is a magical time of year during which college students everywhere flock to the library in attempt to learn a semester's worth of knowledge in only a week. For some students, it's their first time in the library all semester, maybe ever. Others have slaved away many nights under the fluorescent lights, and are slightly annoyed to find their study space being invaded by amateurs. While these newbies wander aimlessly around the first floor, hopelessly trying to find a table, the OGs of the library are already on the third floor long tables deep into their studies. Here is a few signs that you may live in the library, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments