As many of us know at this point, there is an epidemic on college campuses. This epidemic is that one in five women and one in 16 men are sexually assaulted or raped during their time in college. Almost anyone that goes to college will either be a victim or meet a victim of one of the worst crimes that one person can commit on another. There are often stories of these cases that either go viral or spread around campuses, and we always feel awful for survivors. However, many people take the route of victim blaming rather than putting fault on the actual perpetrators of the crime. This is not how we treat any other crime and only creates a system of more individuals becoming afraid to tell their stories and receive help.
So since we so often fail to actually address those who are at fault for rape, I thought I'd make a reminder for any of the potential rapists of exactly what they need to avoid doing in order to not commit a crime.
If a person is unconscious, intoxicated, or sleeping, then they are unable to consent.
When person is wearing clothes that you think express their desire for sex, then you better think again, because clothing cannot express consent.
Just because a person comes to your room with you to hang out does not mean that they have consented.
Sometimes a person consents to specific conditions. If those conditions are broken, then that consent no longer is valid.
Having someone consent to sex with you once does not mean that the consent carries over into future situations.
Someone who has had many different partners still must consent before you try having sex with them.
If a person does not verbally agree to sex, then they have not consented. Only yes means yes.
It really is not hard to understand that consent is needed in order to have sex. Without consent there is no sex; there is just rape. There is absolutely no one to blame for rape except for the rapist. Only the rapist is to blame if they are sent to jail and their "life is ruined," which is only a suitable punishment for the damage that they gave to another individual.
There is no excuse for rape to occur, especially at the rate that it does on college campuses. Rather than blaming the victims of these crimes, we need to start blaming the rapists. We also need to put more of a focus on preventing potential rapists from raping by educating them about consent rather than educating potential victims on how to dress or behave to prevent being raped. This is the only way we will be able to address the rape culture that exists in our society.