How to Make a Relationship Last

These days it seems as if “you know what buddies” last longer than real relationships. I hear the phrase chivalry is dead, used more than the words please and thank you. Facebook is flooded with memes and people placing the blame everywhere but themselves, saying there’s no such thing as loyalty or they’re all the same (referring to woman/men). I say that couldn’t be further from the truth.

The truth is there are plenty of loyal and willing people out there that want serious relationships but no one wants to put in the time and effort that it requires. Whys that? Our society is that of if its broken throw it away and buy a new one, rather than fix it. On top of that the younger generations have been told over and over that love is easy and natural and you shouldn’t have to work for it. If you think rationally, you know that can’t be true. Almost every relationship whether it be family, friends, or a partner requires work because, let’s face it, getting use to another person is not as easy as it sounds. This is not Disney this is real life and we need to have realistic expectations. Relationships are not all rainbows and butterflies.

Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying if you’re miserable its true love. Most of the time you have a gut feeling telling you what’s right or not, but humans tend to ignore that feeling. Now let me be clear if he/she talks you down, bullies, or hurts you mentally or physically IT IS NOT LOVE. Do not settle because you’re afraid of the unknown because you WILL find the right one I promise. Oh, on that note I don’t believe in the “you’ll just know” theory, I believe you can fall in love repeatedly with person after person but it’s a matter of choosing to commit to an individual.

So, what makes a good relationship? The best relationship advice I ever got was called the three C’s Commitment, Compromise, Communication. Without any one of these you are doomed from the start. I know so many couples who have no trust in each other, this lack of trust leads to arguments, snooping and dishonesty. If there’s anything that kills the love between two people, it’s the uncertainty and mistrust that floods the dating world these days. Many people bring their past relationships problems to their new relationship, it can be hard to have faith that not everyone is the same. I always say ill trust you until you give me a reason not to. Trust is a funny thing it takes one thing to destroy it and years to rebuild, so its easily one of the most valuable assets a relationship can have.

Now I’d like to think this is the most important thing I’m going to talk about. You must learn to communicate, but do so in a non-aggressive way, learn to listen to understand rather than listen to reply. Show appreciation, be forgiving, and yes, I’m going to say it DO NOT go to bed angry. It’s so important to say you are sorry and mean it rather than build up feelings! Once you push a person to their limit I promise you won’t get them back so practice communication skills like tone, and thinking twice before you speak. If you really love them I promise it’s worth the work, so leave the past in the past.