My parents met in a geology lab on my mother's first day of college. Many of my family members met their spouse in college. Dozens of my dad's colleagues met in college. In my world, the notion of "you'll go to college and meet your best friends, your spouse, and have the time of your life" has been ingrained my brain for 19.5 years. I guess that means it's no surprise that when I arrived on campus a month and a half ago, part of me was expecting a boyfriend within days of arrival. Yes, I have recently become aware that that expectation was ridiculous and stupid. Despite that, I had multiple other expectation that are already coming true. That being said, here is my step-by-stupid-step of how to be single in college.
1. Do the things you want to do.
You have dreams, ambitions, and goals to achieve. Relationships are nice, but you shouldn't allow upsetting news from your crush in justice class to ruin your day. Study hard, be you, and kick butt. You'll get over him, and he'll suddenly wonder why he didn't like you before.
2. Don't listen to stereotypes.
No, it's not weird that you didn't date until you were 22. It's not weird to be a virgin at age 18. Life is not a race to the finish line. Take your time, and get done what is in front of you. You have a life to live, not society.
3. You can have lazy days by yourself, or with friends.
Rainy days seem to be defined by sleeping until noon, and then cuddling with your boo and watching movies. This is completely overrated. Stuff animals, good friends, and your preference of snacks and genres are too good for anybody else you could find.
4. Cut the middle school drama.
Crushes, roommate fights, and the silent treatment are taboo in college. You are an adult. Speak your mind, go after what you want, and do your work. If you don't practice now, you're not going to be able to do it in four years.
5. Go to extra-curricular activities that are designed just for fun.
Academic clubs are important for networking and things of that nature, but do fun on the side. Join anything that sparks your interest, and quit if you end up taking on too much.
6. Never allow anyone to make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.
You have goals and dreams. Chase them. Do not let anyone make you feel like you can't be who you want to be or that you aren't intelligent.
7. Own your college experience.
You are here for you, for your own benefit. Never dwell on the things went wrong or the stuff you could have improved upon. 12. "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent".
Eleanor Roosevelt is one of my favorite icons in history, and for good reasoning. It sounds cliche, but really, you have to allow yourself to be happy, and you cannot let anyone take that away from you.
8. If you do find "someone special", make sure they treat you right.
I've never been in a relationship to know how I want to be treated, but some of my friends have been in relationships that were just wrong. You are your own person, and you are not somebody's toy. Never forget that you deserve somebody who treats you like royalty.
P.S. The world is your throne, so take a seat.
