My boyfriend is a Powerlifter. Most people don't know or understand the culture of these people, they are like a special breed of crazy. Powerlifting competitions consist of very large men eating meat out of containers and loud grunting noises. In case you're wondering what Powerlifting is, look below the picture of my boyfriend possibly popping a blood vessel or something, who knows.
He said Powerlifting is:
"People compete for the best one rep max in squatting, benching, and dead lifting. Whoever lifts the most weight wins -- pretty simple stuff." Here's how you can be like him:
Step 1:
"Start your day violently, set your alarm clock to the angriest music you can find. I personally recommend "The Purest Strain Of Hate" by The Art Is Murder. Nothing preps you for the day like waking up with a heart attack."
Step 2:
"A.M. B.M. Gotta clear out the pipes to make room for the food you're about to eat."
Step 3:
"Epic. Breakfast. Mariusz Zbigniew Pudzianowski, 4 time "World's Strongest Man" champion would eat 10 eggs and a half pound of bacon every morning. Strive to be like him."
Step 4:
"Go back to bed, gotta save those precious calories because every season is bulking season. You'll wake up feeling rested and hungry again."
Step 5:
"Keep eating, the more dead animal the better."
Step 6:
"SFW (Smash F**king Weights). Lift heavy. Lift often. If you're gunna do cardio you might as well take your gains out back and shoot 'em."
Step 7:
"Now that you're done at the gym you're pretty bored. Might as well eat again, and again, and again."
Step 8:
"Outside of the gym do as little work as possible. The higher the heart rate, the lower the total."
Step 9:
"You make gains while you sleep. So cuddle up with a plate full of protein and pass out until you violently awaken tomorrow."
"Eat a ton of protein. Squat heavy. Push heavy objects. Have sex. Love life." Jim Wendler
So there you have it. In case you were wondering how to break world records while simultaneously eating and sleeping as much as you can, follow the Powerlifting regime. Special thanks to Louis Ban (@big.fat.and.ugly on instagram) for giving us a special insight into the life of a Powerlifter.
