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How To Be A Friend

Especially to those battling cancer.

Jun 17, 2019

media-public.canva.com

In November 2018 when I was diagnosed with brain cancer, my world felt as if it melted around me in loose pieces that could never be picked up. I wanted to talk about it to those who loved me because I knew they would really care, but the more people I spoke with, the more I heard, "Well my family member has been through this so I know what it's like" or "I saw this in a movie once".

I appreciate the story but a phrase I quickly learned from my oncologist was "Everyone is different." I'm my own person, my own story, and no one but me knows how my illness makes me feel.

Now, I'm not trying to make this "Boohoo! All about me!", but I want other people looking for advice to know how to be a friend to someone they love who is hard time.

1. Invites

Plenty of times I'm asked to do things: trips, hangouts, go to the mall. Most times I have to decline due to my health. I may look okay most of the time but the truth is my body is struggling to just make it up the stairs. This doesn't mean give up asking, one day I promise they'll say yes.

2. Endurance

Don't be insulted if after an hour or two your friend wants to go home. In my personal experience I live on bursts of energy. Sometimes it lasts, sometimes it doesn't, but that doesn't mean they don't want to hangout with you.

3. Be Mindful

Be mindful of what you say, do, and even eat. This is a really sensitive time for the individual, and yes smell plays a huge part in it. So when they're around try to be courteous.

Overall, all anyone really wants is a friend to make them smile, spend time with, and to be able to confide it. Cancer is a really scary time, and it's even scarier to do it alone. Be the friend you would want to have.

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How To Be A Friend

Especially to those battling cancer.

In This Article:

1. Invites

2. Endurance

3. Be Mindful

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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