So you're starting to get that sneaky little feeling in your stomach and before you know it BAM- you've got a case of the feels. (For those of you, mom, who aren't aware what "the feels" are- it's more or less when you have feelings for someone, though can also refer to pretty much any and all emotions.) Things started out fine and now all of a sudden you're triple checking texts to make sure they sound right, worrying about being eager, but not too eager, etc. Don't worry, we've all been there at one time or another. Follow this guide for avoiding the feels and you'll be as good as new in no time!
1. Step one: Don't be an idiot.
Harsh? Maybe a little, but so is putting someone down for showing any sign that they have emotions. Here's a little reality check for you: we all in fact do have feelings. No matter how much you want to flaunt the no shits given attitude, at the end of the day the things people say and do to you will affect you in one way or another. I'm not sure when society, my generation especially, started romanticizing the idea of being emotionless, but quite frankly I'm sick of it. I'm tired of everyone tiptoeing around trying to hide how they feel, and you should be too.
2. If you're happy and you know it -- SHOW IT.
While "happiness" seems to be one of the only emotions people decide to show anymore, it's still all about the context. You shouldn't downplay how happy something makes you for the sake of impressing others. It shouldn't be "cool" to pretend you're emotionless. If something makes you happy, express it and don't care if no one else feels the same. I'm talking Ben Wyatt when Leslie gives him The Iron Throne happy (shout out to my Parks and Rec. people). At the end of the day, if it makes you happy that's all that matters.
3. Don't let people get away with walking all over you.
A direct product of our "avoid emotions at all costs" mindset is people get mistreated left and right. Is there ever going to be a day where everyone is nice to each other all the time? No, probably not. However, that doesn't mean you should sit back and let people treat you however they want while you pretend it doesn't have an effect on you. It's important to be able to let things roll off your back sometimes, but you still need to know how to stand up for yourself. If you don't, chances are no one will and people take advantage of that.
4. Crying isn't the end of the world.
It seems to be a universal idea that crying is equivalent to being weak, and anyone who feels as if that's the truth can take that idea and shove it where the sun doesn't shine. I cry, a lot. More than I'd like to admit. But hey, I'm an emotional person. It doesn't mean I'm weak, and it doesn't always mean I'm sad. If I laugh too hard, I cry. If I even think about watching "Say Yes to the Dress," I cry. Once I even got so excited about a cute puppy that I cried. (Okay maybe more than once.. No shame) And sure, if someone hurts my feelings enough, I'll probably cry. People can be cruel and you don't have to hide the fact that sometimes it gets to you. Crying expresses such a broad range of emotions, and you shouldn't be looked down on for it.
5. You're allowed to get angry.
Sometimes people say and do things that piss you off, and that's okay. Sometimes it's justified and other times maybe you're just being over dramatic but you know what? It's okay. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone, ever. You shouldn't pretend that everything is fine and dandy when someone wrongs you. It's good to be able to acknowledge that something bothers you, address it and then move on. You don't have to just brush things under the rug out of fear of looking "high maintenance". If you piss me off, I'm going to let you know and you should do the same!
6. Finally, if you like someone, TELL THEM.
The idea that we should engage in endless mind games with each other instead of just being forward about how we feel is so stupid. Please, explain to me the point in acting like we're too cool for each other and playing it off as if we don't care when really we just want to be with someone? We waste so much time worrying about if we're texting too fast, who texts first, what emoji to use, etc. Time that could instead be spent going on dates and, you know, being with the person we want to be with. Crazy idea, I know.
When it comes down to it, you shouldn't worry about what other people think. Avoiding "the feels", and any emotion for that matter, like the plague will do nothing but leave you confused and wondering what the hell is going on because you have no idea what anyone else is actually thinking. How about we all just stop denying the fact that we have emotions and move on with our happy, sad, emotional, dysfunctional lives?
