Whether you are transitioning into a new semester or making new changes in your life, it is easy to get lost along the way. What exactly does “lost” mean? Being lost can mean to no longer understand the significance of your purpose. We usually think we are lost after the adjustments in our lives when in reality we are off track due to what we were refusing to change in the first place. It is the feeling of “what now?” that leaves us feeling misplaced.
If you are changing your major, breaking off a relationship, trying to improve your GPA, it can be extremely overwhelming and can be defeating at first. That being the case, self-care is so important in times of transitions. A lot easier said than done, but I promise it is worth it to take care of yourself during this time.
I personally have overcome the battle of being lost with the help of self-care. It was the second semester of my freshman year that I had not only changed my major but also broken off a major relationship in my life. There was a small and short hiatus of feeling accomplished. Quickly, that began to fade into dysphoria.
On the outside I was involved and extroverted also, I was constantly surrounded by people that loved me. It did not matter, I let this feeling completely consume me until I was a different person: depressed and filled with anxiety. I was not taking care of myself and was pushing others away who wanted to be there for me. These two conditions began to define me. But, I realized is this a battle I must face. I cast out my anxiety and depression by calling it out for what it was and what it was doing to me. I eventually told my family and friends that I pushed away because I thought my battle was too big.
I knew that this was not enough, I needed to prevent, as much as possible, these conditions from stealing me away again. I realized had to genuinely take care of myself. I took the summer to mentally prepare myself for what to do differently next semester. Then, during this past semester, as a sophomore, I took time for myself, got organized, stayed on top of my schedule, and reached out to friends. Starting a new major and removing myself from a toxic relationship was finally freeing due to self-care. Here are my few favorite tips for truly taking care of yourself:
1. Getting over the fear of rejection
Stop being afraid to ask people to hang out. Surround yourself with people the authentically love you. In your free time if you crave quality time, spend time with people that make you feel like the best version of yourself.
2. Do not be afraid to be alone.
Take some time to yourself and evaluate where you are in your day, week, and life. Make some sticky notes of what you would like to accomplish, drink some water, put on a face mask, or watch a few episodes of your favorite Netflix show. Get to know yourself. We sometimes can become lost in others.
3. Find the true balance between doing what you want to do and what you need to do.
Sometimes we need to learn to get your stuff done before the play. But also, do not forget to have fun. It is extremely easy to get caught up in one of the two. Think of these as Yin and Yang. There is no peace without the two. Side note: Know what your definition of fun is. If it is driving around for two hours and then going to Waffle House then DO IT. If it is going out with your friends till 1:00 am then DO IT. Never feel pressured into something social.
4. Stop comparing yourself.
What may work for someone else, may not work for you. It is okay to get advice from others but does not let their opinions overwhelm you. Always, work with small implications of advice at first. Do not become discouraged by the success of others. You cannot rush self-growth.
It is okay to not know where you are going, but do not become complacent. Self-care is how you maintain self-growth and compassion towards yourself. Sometimes, getting out of our comfort zone is the best remedy for finding your true purpose.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” ~ Mark Twain