While I dreaded watching Spanish telenovelas throughout my Spanish career in high school, I have found a new appreciation for them, thanks to The CW’s Jane the Virgin. Earlier this week Netflix started streaming the third season, and I immediately started watching it as soon as I got the notification from the Netflix app on my phone about its arrival.

In the second episode of the third season, there is a scene where Jane is sitting on her front porch with her crush, a man named Sam. He is at her house to give her a birthday present, which Jane unwraps and discovers is a book. I don’t remember the name of the book, I’m sure I could find it with an easy Google search, but the title of the book is irrelevant. Once Jane opens the book and then thanks Sam for giving it to her, he responds by telling her how the book ends. Jane smiles and thinks it is a cute gesture. This is because in a prior scene Jane says she that likes knowing how books end before she reads them, so she isn’t disappointed by the ending.

While little moments like that in a TV show usually just pass by in my head, this scene stuck in my head, and got me thinking. Do I want to know how something is going to end before it actually ends? Do I want to know who I am going to marry now? Do I want to know how I am going to die now?

After a lot of thinking I decided that I disagree.

I remember one of the biggest plot twists to ever happen in my life was when McDreamy died on Grey’s Anatomy. For those people who know me well, you know that I go to bed early. So I would never stay up until 11 pm on a school night to watch TV when I had school early the next day. I would always watch Grey’s the next afternoon when I got home from school.

Unfortunately when I woke up the morning after the season finale, when McDreamy is unfortunately killed, it was all over Facebook. People writing hypothetical letters to Shonda Rhimes yelling at her for doing this, shrines to Derek Shepherd (no I’m not making that up.) I even had friends that wore black to school that day so they could mourn appropriately.

I was mad. Not only that the fact that my ultimate TV crush had just died but at the fact that I didn’t get to react properly. I of course had to watch the episode to see exactly what happened, but there was no initial shock.

I was then watching a different episode of Grey’s Anatomy after I watched Jane the Virgin. I have been behind a season due to poor planning at school so I was catching up.

One of the episodes featured a girl who knew she was going to die.

This girl had an inoperable tumor and was given months to live. So she decided to have sex with as many hot men that she could find, because she was going to die anyway, she wanted to live her life to the fullest extent, and by her definition that was by having sex with a lot of different men. I guess we all have different ideas of fun.

So I ask you, whoever is reading this and feels like responding, do you want to know how the book ends?