In a time where there is so much media influence with how women are portrayed, more and more women are battling insecurities and low self-esteem. Whether your at the mall glancing at Victoria Secrets beautiful flat-stomach models or scrolling through social media seeing gorgeous ladies portraying absolutely put-together lives with healthy eating and adventurous posts, its everywhere. There is currently a competitive stigma in women's culture to be perfect. Compared to what standard? The one portrayed in the media? I am still not sure. But the pressure to rise to those standards are truly evident within society and can sometimes have antagonizing results. I face some insecurities about myself that I wish were better, like many young women out there. But my question is why? Why do we compare ourselves? Why are we our hardest critic? Why do we find parts of our body to hate on? Why do we think we're not enough?
Is it because we look for affirmation in others? We want a boyfriend? We want to feel special or wanted, and we think by getting that it takes 'physical' perfection? Everyone has their personal reasons but I think us, as women, can do better than this. I am not going to blame men for the beauty goals and standards that we set for ourselves (when we possibly could). We are responsible for the pressures we put on ourselves and what we value in ourselves and others. Being a young woman and having a group of friends, can confidently state that I think we all have insecurities and things we wish we can change about ourselves physically or mentally. I am tired of hearing my friends complain about parts of their bodies, thinking their not enough or wishing they were better at this or that. There needs to be less self-critic and more self-love. Life is too short, and God blessed each and everyone with their own unique temple.
1. Stop Comparing Yourself
We all do it and yes sometimes we can't help it. I am right there with you! But ladies we need to realize there is no contest. Everyone has different and amazing attributes. Isn't it funny how we seem to want things we don't have? Like having straight hair and wishing it was curly. Or if you wish you were shorter because your tall? Can you imagine if we were all the same. Every body style or facial structure is different and unique which is the very reason why each and everyone is so beautiful. Yes we all would kill for rock-hard abs with a flat stomach but genetically some are made that way and some aren't. It is what it is, and you're unique for a special reason.
2. Accept Yourself
Are you going to live your whole life in self-demise about a certain area of yourself? Or are you going to accept that insecurity and move on? Someone out there would kill for an attribute that you have. It's true. And I hate how girls can't just love themselves because they haven't accepted every inch yet. Own that insecurity. It is after all, a part of what makes you, you. Don't hold yourself back and lessen your own value.
3. Value Other's Different Attributes
I feel like sometimes we are hard on ourselves and put pressure on ourselves because we care so much about another persons opinion and what others will think. Why do we think other people are judging us? Well, because we are judging others. If we have more of an accepting outlook toward all different types of beauty out there than we will feel less and put less pressure on ourselves. If we accept other peoples flaws than accepting ours will be easier.
4. Don't Look To Others For Validation
Worry about loving you instead of the idea of other people loving you. Your own self-validation is enough. And please girl, believe that it is! If you rely on others for your happiness, life will always be a rollercoaster of up and downs.
5. Live the Life You're Proud Of
If you want to start waking up early, work out in or go on that trip you've always wanted to, do it! Life is too short not to, so have no regrets. Be proud of the life you want to live and do everything you passionate for to the fullest.
6. Appreciate those "So Called" Flaws
Every girl has something they cannot stand about themselves that is probably an insecurity stewed from the perfection ladies see in the media. These flaws can truly grow to become a confidence killers if they are focused on enough. In contrast, every girl needs to realize they have some attributes other girl would kill to have. So, don't just accept the "so called" flaws, appreciate them.
7. Don't Fall Victim to Craving to the Shallow
Why do women want a big butt or boobs? It certainly does not make life easier or more worthwhile. Think about it, what actual benefit to life do those two physical characteristics bring. We face pressure to have have those things. Other than to seem more attractive to boys, I can't think of anything else. I say "boys" because boys are the ones who base the attractiveness of a woman on those two things. A boy focused on those shallow trials is not a man worth having. Having a healthy physique and being happy with yourself is the real goal. You were made perfectly, exactly how He wanted you to be.
Reading these things are one thing, truly believing them is a whole other. And if these seven steps haven't set in yet, here is a nice lil' video to get you started on your journey of self-love.
