It feels like it's been quite a while since I've written one of these sit-down-and-ponder pieces, but I've recently been confronted with some things that I think need addressing. I often have times in my life where I look at how someone handles something and think, "We live very different lives." We were raised differently. We're from very different places. However, I think that my parents have done a pretty great job raising myself and my older sister. Neither of us are perfect in any way, shape or form but we're doing the best with what we have and we have our parents to thank for that.
We were taught how to act in public at a very young age. We weren't allowed to run around in restaurants or throw temper tantrums at dinner. If we did, my dad would take us outside and put us in the car so we could get it out of our system out there. There's nothing wrong with people who weren't raised that way but that is just how we grew up. We learned how to handle ourselves in public way before we would ever be put into the situation where we would have to.
We were spanked when we misbehaved. I know this ruffles a lot of feathers but it didn't ruffle ours so you can sit down. If we were bad kids, we were going to be punished. We were nowhere close to being in the realm of "child abuse." We weren't "beaten." We were disciplined and there is a big difference. We learned the consequences of our actions and that is how we learned to not do it again. We learned to think through every outcome of our decisions.
We were taught that to get respect, you have to give it. My parents taught me to respect my elders -- to a point. Even if you dislike someone, you have to respect them. I'll admit that even now, as a twenty-year-old woman living 200+ miles away from my parents, I still have trouble with this one. However, I try my hardest. I try to make sure I value other people's opinions. I try to make sure I acknowledge that although I disagree, I respect their right to share. All I ask in return is that you hold yourself to the same standard. If you don't, I won't be as kind.
Lastly, we were taught work ethic. I didn't come from a financially thriving area of Pennsylvania. My family struggled, but my parents made sure that my sister and I never wanted. We never went hungry. We had great birthdays, Christmases and Easters from the time we were born and up until this very day. They did so by working. My parents made sure we knew exactly how we were able to live the way we did. They pushed us to work hard in school. They pushed us to do extra curricular activities and internships and start looking for jobs because they know we can do it.
It's taken me a long time to be confident and happy with where I am in my life. If I'm being completely transparent, there are days when I still struggle. There have been three times in this semester where I've started packing my bags to go home. But overall, I am happy to be where I am. I am happy to be doing what I'm doing and I am happy to be their daughter.
One day, I'm going to have a daughter. I'm going to raise her the exact same way my parents raised me. She is going to be respectful, professional, beautiful and confident. I know a lot of people who say they don't want to be anything like their parents but that's not me. Because my parents did one hell of a good job.