With cuffing season officially upon us, many are spending what they consider to be ample amount of time with their partner.
Whether it's Disney+ and chill or running to the store in your matching PJ sets to grab those mini marshmallows for your hot chocolate, you and your partner are bound to spend some holiday time together. These festivities that were thought to take only an hour, can quickly turn into a full day of fun. Before you know it, it's three days later and your parents are irritated that you haven't been home. Oops!
So, how much time is too much time to spend with your significant other? Well, It's contingent on your relationship, how well you're taking care of yourself, and how you're spending your time together.
It's perfectly normal for a new couple to spend a great deal of time together. After all, it's an exciting time in your lives as they begin to crave newfound attention and love and weave their two lives together. As the relationship progresses and the honeymoon phase starts to subside, unexpected life and work events might get in the way.
According to "Psychology Today," one partner's professional goals and ambitions can impose stress on a relationship if the other partner expects a different level of availability.
So, what do you do? One word: communicate.
Talking to your partner to set boundaries and expectations will help to alleviate future tension and strain. How much time do you expect to see each other? What does a busy week look like for you and your partner? How will you both handle a long period of absence?
Couples must also learn to take some alone time for themselves… and for their family.
New data from Match.com found that women today want more alone time, girl time, and even separate vacations from their significant others than years past. Spending alone time can help to make you a stronger, more independent individual. It's a time to love yourself, boost your confidence, and help you reflect on any so-called "baggage" you might have. While you may want to ditch the alone time to be with your partner, think twice. Being the best person you can be by yourself, is going to make your relationship the best it can be when you are together.
OK, OK… My partner and I have shared expectations of how much time we want to spend together, AND I've come up with a schedule of my own to dedicate time to family, friends, and myself. Now what?
Now think about how you and your partner are spending your time together.
Based on responses of 10,000 people who took an online quiz in December, "quality time" was ranked the #2 most important way to express and receive love. "Quality time" is best defined as "time spent in giving another person one's undivided attention in order to strengthen a relationship."
So, no… arguing over who gets to pick the next Netflix show doesn't count.
Here are a few fun ideas for what to do when you're looking for some undivided-attention, love-gushing, one-on-one time:
Play a game together.
This could include video games, board games, or a card game. I know my boyfriend and I love to play cards while catching up on the latest "Below Deck" episode.
Cook together.
I am certainly no cook, however learning to cook with my boyfriend doesn't sound like an awful idea for some quality time.
Try new things together.
Go on a hike, try a new restaurant together, explore a new side of town you've never been to.
Every relationship is different, so giving an exact number on time spent together is not realistic. However, these handy-dandy tips will help to make your alone-time, family-time, and couple-time, not only more exciting and fun, but meaningful as well.
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