Before I got to college, I had a pretty good idea of what it was going to be. I thought I would immediately find my people and everything would just click. In every movie I’ve watched about college, it seems like it should be easy to make the leap. I thought, just like the characters in the movies, I would have a best friend by the first day, excel in all of my classes, find my passion and determine what I want out of life. While it has been a great experience altogether, that certainly wasn’t the case at first.
In high school, I knew exactly who I was. I was an athlete, a field hockey state champion even. I was student government secretary and a class officer. I was a student and a member of the band. I had some of the worlds greatest friends and teammates who became my soul sisters. Towards the end of my senior year especially, I felt really secure and happy with the way my life was going.
On move in day, I was thrilled. I was finally going to meet my roommate, the girl I would be living with for the next eight months. As I unpacked my bags and maneuvered my stuff around our tiny dorm room, I was really excited. The girls on my floor seemed nice and friendly and I couldn’t wait to find the my lifelong friends, that society convinces you you’ll find in college. I couldn't wait to get a degree and make a difference in this world. My new life was finally beginning and I couldn’t wait to finally chase these big dreams of mine.
It wasn’t until I had to hug my family goodbye, though, that it hit me what exactly the cost of these dreams were. I was literally closing a chapter of my life, a chapter that morphed me into everything that I am and everything that I want to be. I felt like I had to say goodbye to everything that made me, me. I am not an athlete anymore, I’m not a member of student government, and my job is on hold until I go back home for break. My friends, the people who give me the confidence and support I rely on, are at different schools.
I missed my support system dearly, but I also missed myself. I missed going to practice every afternoon and planning fundraisers and dances with student government. Despite this adjustment being so difficult, it was one of the best things that could've happened to me. I learned more about myself in the first few months of college than I had in my whole eighteen years of existence.
After growing up shy and allowing other people to talk for me, I was in a place where I needed to speak for myself. I learned that I don't mind speaking up.
In high school, I would never enter a room of complete strangers. Since I didn't know a single soul here, I had to force myself out of my comfort zone and talk to new people. And they are some of the most extraordinary people I've ever known.
I am taking a variety of classes and figuring out exactly what I want to do. I am learning there are so many different ways I can make my mark on this world.
Adjusting to college is, by far, one of the most difficult tasks I've undertaken. Life as I knew it changed completely. Now that I am standing on the other side, however, I am so proud of what I've accomplished, and I cannot wait to see where this journey will take me.
