How To Love Someone With Anxiety | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

How To Love Someone With Anxiety

We don't need you to fix us; we just need you to listen.

124
How To Love Someone With Anxiety
Hyper Geeky

Anxiety is hard. It’s messy. It’s not the adorable awkwardness that Tumblr makes it out to be. It’s sweating and nausea and panic attacks and worrying, worrying, worrying. If it exists, I have worried about it. Even if it doesn’t exist, there’s a still good chance I have worried about it. One of things I worry about most is how my anxiety affects the people I love—literally worrying about worrying. As hard as this is for me, I know it also can’t be easy on my friends, family, and boyfriend. I may be the one lying on the floor in tears, struggling to breathe, but they have to watch me, feeling helpless because there’s nothing they can do. Luckily, I have an awesome support system that is literally my saving grace. Thank you, guys. You mean the world to me. To anyone else who loves someone with anxiety, here’s what I suggest:


1. Be Patient with Us

Things that may seem really easy to you can be really hard for us. Always encourage us to try new things, and break out of our comfort zones, but don’t rush us or expect us to do it all at once.

2. Be Flexible

My worst habit is making a ton of plans when I feel good and then not being able to do any of them. Anxiety results in a lot of cancelled plans. We’re not bailing on you, and I promise we feel awful when we have to cancel.

3. Give Us an Escape Route

A big part of anxiety stems from worrying that I’m going to be in a place where I’m anxious and uncomfortable and not able to leave. If you tell me, “We have to go to this party” I will be all kinds of freaked out. But, if you say “We’ll go to this party, but if you need to, we can leave.” I usually don’t even have a problem staying the whole time. I just need to know that leaving is an option if I do need it. Also, a good idea is to have a code phrase, something common like “I left something in my car” or “my phone is dying.” I just have to say my code phrase and my boyfriend knows that I need to get out of there and I don’t have to worry about feeling rude or awkward.

4. Ask Us What We Need

Everyone handles their anxiety differently. When I start panicking, everyone’s first reaction is to hug me. I appreciate that, but it just makes me feel trapped and it's harder to breathe. Ask the person what helps them most, when they’re having a panic attack or just in general to help with their anxiety.

5. Just Listen

I know it must be hard to watch us spiraling out of control when there’s nothing you can do… but seriously, sometimes there’s just nothing you can do. Don’t try to fix the problem, or shush us. Just let us ramble on about whatever ridiculous thing is bothering us. Let us freak out. Then, once we’ve calmed down we can talk about things rationally and come up with a solution. We get that you want to help, but we also don’t need you to fix us. We just need you to be there.


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
10 things that happen the second Thanksgiving is over
reference.com

To those who celebrate, you just spent an entire day cooking an elaborate meal with all of your favorite foods. You probably ate your body weight in pumpkin pie and mashed potatoes. What happens now? Oh yea, Christmas. It’s time to take out all of the decorations and Christmas themed things that have been sitting in the attic since last year; it’s time to make a reappearance. So, here are 10 things that happen the second Thanksgiving is over.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

18 Things I Want To Do Now That I'm 18

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

3480
Happy Birthday Cake

For the entirety of my high school career, I was always seen as the goody-two-shoes. I never got in trouble with a teacher, I kept stellar grades, and when I wasn't doing extracurricular activities, I was at home studying. Even when I did go out, it was usually with a bunch of fellow band geeks. The night would end before 11:00 PM and the only controversial activity would be a fight based on who unfairly won a round of Apples-to-Apples when someone else clearly had a better card (I promise I'm not still holding a grudge).

Now that I'm officially an adult, I want to pursue some new things. I want to experience life in a way that I never allowed myself to do prior to entering college. These are the years that I'm supposed to embark on a journey of self-discovery, so what better way to do that than to create a bucket list?

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics

The holiday classics that shaped my life

2118
10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics
Flickr

The holiday season is full of stress, debt, and forced conversation. While we rush through the month of December, it's important to take a step back and enjoy the moments before they're gone. Most families love to watch Christmas movies, but these beloved films provide more than entertainment. Here are 10 life lessons that I've learned from the holiday classics we watch every year.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

201447
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

21735
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments