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How Do I Love Halloween? Let Me Count The Ways

It's That Time Again Kiddies

Dawn Bolitho

Oct 10, 2016

Centenary College of New Jersey

How Do I Love Halloween? Let Me Count The Ways

www.i-mockery.com

The cool crisp air whistling through the trees along quiet, moonlit neighborhoods; the scenery like abstract paintings in hues of orange, yellows, and reds; the crazily comfy sweaters that wrap you like a warm hug. Yup, it’s official. Fall has arrived and it is graciously accompanied by the ever-exhilarating all Hallows Eve, and a spirit that spreads like a virus through die-hard Halloween fans everywhere.

Twisted souls from all walks of life suddenly begin to assemble frightening displays of evil-doings and massive maniacal miscreants. Immortal beings by the hundreds flood the once serene communities’ homes, roadways, and lives. Establishments everywhere host cult-like gatherings for the earthbound dead, the criminally insane, the bewitchingly beautiful, the outrageously originals to come together to worship their sacred occasion.

Yes, the moment the heat breaks and the first leaf falls, it's go time. Here are just a few of my favorites, enjoy!

1. A whole month of horror!!

Old horror, new horror, blood & guts galore. Even my favorite shows feature spooky special episodes. Yes, I spend a lot of time with the lights on and the blankets up to my eyeballs, but it's totally worth it.

2. Candy, Candy, CANDY!

It's a good thing it's sweater weather because around now I start eating candy like it's my job!

3. "Cuz this is Thriller"

Classic! Every single person in America should know it and break into dance the moment they hear it.

4. Jack-o-Lantern-ing

Who says it's not ok to have fourteen carved pumpkins scattered about your front yard?

Oh the possibilities......

5. Harvest Festivals & Hayrides

Apple Cider & Pumpkin Picking

6. Haunted attractions

The wet your pants, scare the sugar out of you, and scream like a little girl kind of fun.

7. Pumpkin Spice EVERYTHING!!

Wait......are those condoms and tampons?!?

8. Indulging my Inner Child

I don't care how old you are, dressing up for Halloween is pure awesomeness!

9. It's a Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown

10. Gorgeousness everywhere you look

11. The. Walking. Dead.

...and Daryl <3

12. Home-front Haunts

It's not hard to figure out who the Halloween freaks are and aren't.....

......and we wouldn't have it any other way!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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How Do I Love Halloween? Let Me Count The Ways

It's That Time Again Kiddies

1. A whole month of horror!!

Old horror, new horror, blood & guts galore. Even my favorite shows feature spooky special episodes. Yes, I spend a lot of time with the lights on and the blankets up to my eyeballs, but it's totally worth it.

2. Candy, Candy, CANDY!

It's a good thing it's sweater weather because around now I start eating candy like it's my job!

3. "Cuz this is Thriller"

Classic! Every single person in America should know it and break into dance the moment they hear it.

4. Jack-o-Lantern-ing

Who says it's not ok to have fourteen carved pumpkins scattered about your front yard?

Oh the possibilities......

5. Harvest Festivals & Hayrides

Apple Cider & Pumpkin Picking

6. Haunted attractions

The wet your pants, scare the sugar out of you, and scream like a little girl kind of fun.

7. Pumpkin Spice EVERYTHING!!

Wait......are those condoms and tampons?!?

8. Indulging my Inner Child

I don't care how old you are, dressing up for Halloween is pure awesomeness!

9. It's a Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown

10. Gorgeousness everywhere you look

11. The. Walking. Dead.

...and Daryl <3

12. Home-front Haunts

It's not hard to figure out who the Halloween freaks are and aren't.....

......and we wouldn't have it any other way!

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AKA, Christmas overload.

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1. Watch an R-rated Scary Movie in a Movie Theater

2. Buy a Lottery Ticket

3. Vote in an Election

4. Participate in a Run (or a Walk, Realistically) for Charity

5. Go on a Road Trip

6. Start a Savings Account

7. Get a Credit Card

8. Sign up for Spotify Premium

9. Go to a Club

10. Start a Meditation Routine

11. Go to a Yoga Class

12. Treat Myself to a Dinner for One

13. Volunteer for a Charity

14. Participate in a Research Study

15. Bake Something (That Ends Up Being Edible)

16. Go Skydiving

17. Be Called for Jury Duty

18. Figure Out What I Want to Do With my Life

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

"If you won't use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose."

"Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

"If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find a that love actually is all around."

"Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on."

"'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.'"

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."

"There's room for everyone on the nice list."

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

10. If 2 mind readers read each other's minds whose mind are they really reading?

11. Is there a synonym for "synonym"?

12. If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?

13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

14. If I try to fail, but succeed, which one did I do?

15. If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off?

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