From a young age, we are taught to love who we are as individuals. When we were younger, it seemed so simple, but the older you get the more difficult it seems to be. For many of us, loving who we are is simply our self-esteem, but there is so much more than that. Your laughter, your eyes, your smile, your dreams, what makes you smile, your kindness; the list is endless. You are a unique individual, there is no one else like you in the world.
I've struggled my entire life to understand this statement. Growing up I was extremely shy and insecure in who I was. It seemed like all I was doing was comparing myself to others and looking over what made me special. (This is such a nasty mindset to have!) My lack of happiness and friends led to depression. A state where all I did was stay home and spend time with my dog. (No shame there.)
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Eventually I began to break out of my shell. I made friends, joined high school activities, and became extremely talented in different hobbies. Being different was welcomed, and celebrated in my group of friends. Each of us brought something special to the table, we all supported each other, we all grew with each other. With all of this growth and new beginnings, I began to shine, and for once in my life I felt true happiness.
As in many of our lives, I came across several obstacles in my journey to that point. My childhood was negative, at 13 years old my father left, I became extremely depressed, lost some friends, and fell right back to where I had started. The idea of having to work so hard to reach that point of happiness and having it ripped out from underneath was the most painful part. I did not have enough faith in myself to get back up and keep fighting. I was angry at myself for failing at what I had. I was lonely, it felt like I had no one there; no support. At that point I realized there were only two choices I had - continue laying there feeling sorry for myself, or getting up and moving forward.
Each day I would think of little things that I liked about myself or things that made me happy. In the mornings, when the sun and the sky created a beautiful piece of art, I would smile. The colors were breathtaking. At school when I would hold the door for someone, their smile would warm up my soul. Taking a moment to appreciate the beauty of a bird free in the sky. Taking a moment to see the beauty in someone else's smile. These were all things that came together to create me.
Eventually I began embracing myself in these events. Every morning I would get up just a few minutes earlier to watch the sun rise. Every car rides were spent jamming. I spent time outside every day listening to the world, the birds chirp, or the wind blow. Every day I made it my goal to help whoever/however I could. With each new individual I met, I kept an open mind and made it a goal to discover what made them beautiful. I would begin thinking of all the things that made me beautiful inside; passion for helping others, my love for nature, my desire for music, my endless dreams. Seeing the beauty in others helped me see the beauty in who I was.
So, for those of you struggling to fall in love with who you are, take a moment to appreciate what makes you smile and discover what makes you so beautiful! We each have something to bring to the table, we each have a purpose, a meaning. Do not let obstacles tear you down, grow and learn from these experiences. Do not allow yourself to be stagnant in your journey towards happiness. The sooner you love you, the happier your life will be.
